Total pages in book: 66
Estimated words: 63911 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 320(@200wpm)___ 256(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 63911 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 320(@200wpm)___ 256(@250wpm)___ 213(@300wpm)
“She’s been crying.” There was a slightest trace of confusion in Jan’s voice. “She never cries.”
The billionaire ascended the stairs slowly, and upon reaching the landing, he saw that the door to their bedroom was left slightly open. She was seated on the carpeted floor, her hair pulled back by a lace band, her face free of makeup, like it had always been since the accident.
She was dressed in an oversized sweater and jeans, and she was busy stacking an assortment of stuff in a huge brown box.
But the moment his gaze fell on her, Ilse’s movements stilled, and his guts twisted in a sickening realization. At that moment, he remembered the first time he and Ilse had returned from the hospital. He remembered her asking if she had come up—-
He had lied, and she had known he lied.
But she had let him.
She had let him lie because if she hadn’t, the truth would have been out in the open.
The truth, and that was that she had needed him that night, and he had chosen not to be there.
SO MANY THOUGHTS STRUCK Ilse all at once as she felt him coming towards her, and for one moment she just wished. She just wished so badly she could see him.
His silky black hair—-
His brilliant blue eyes—-
She strained herself to see, but she just couldn’t. All she could do was wait. All she could do was feel.
I love you.
I hate you.
I need you.
As he came nearer, the familiar scent of him, the familiar heat of him, reached her and Ilse’s every thought disintegrated. Pain and love saturated her heart to the point that it felt like it was about to burst any moment.
And when he finally spoke-—
“Hello.”
She realized how easy – so damn easy – it was to lose any of her other senses. She didn’t even need to be a part of another accident. She only had to love, she only had to hurt, and she could no longer speak.
The seconds stretched between them, unmarred by words, and all the while she could feel him gazing at her, and she hurt even more. It used to be that when he looked at her, she would feel beautiful.
But now she no longer did.
“Ilse—-”
Just the way he uttered her name told Ilse that he was going to tell her about it.
They were going to talk about those photos.
Of him being caught entering another woman’s room—-
When he was supposed to be in love with her.
She turned away from him with a jerk.
“Ilse—-”
She reached for the first item with a shaking hand, and as soon as her fingers wrapped around a mug, she began groping for space inside the box, trying to look for the best possible fit for it.
Ilse had gotten two mugs and a book in by the time the billionaire spoke again. “You don’t want to hear it.”
She froze.
“Do you?’
Ilse slowly shook her head.
“Alright then.” He slowly reached for her hands, and they felt too cold in his. “Alright.” Even knowing it would be better for him to simply let go and walk away—-
Even knowing that he would do her no good—-
His grip tightened.
“Forgive me, Ilse.”
He thought she still wouldn’t speak, and she didn’t. But her head bowed slightly, a nod, and it was still more than he deserved, and the billionaire inhaled deeply. “I’m so damn sorry. So goddamn sorry for everything.”
He spoke, and she would nod.
All small nods, without a single word of recrimination—-
She accepted him.
She believed him, no questions asked.
And it was really more than he deserved.
More than he would ever deserve.
“You know...I have to leave, don’t you?”
Her fingers twitched in his grip. She knew.
But still, they stayed in his hold. She knew...but she didn’t want him to leave.
“I’m not leaving because you’re blind,” the billionaire said hoarsely. “I love you, Ilse. I will always love you. But I know I’ll hurt you even more if I stay, and—-” The billionaire’s tone became savage. “I don’t want to keep failing you to the point that the worst happens. Willem almost died because of me, and I—-”
The mere thought of it – the mere goddamn thought of it was more than he could bear, and he broke off.
His hands loosened.
And even before he came back to his feet, Ilse had already felt her disappearing on him, and her lips started to tremble.
Please don’t disappear on me.
But she covered her mouth, struggling to keep the words and all the tears inside of her.
“Goodbye, Ilse.”
Please don’t disappear on me.
Please.
But he was gone.
She listened for his footsteps, listened for the sound of his car driving away, and when everything was as silent and empty—-
Stumbling to her feet, she began to grope her way out of the room and clutched the newly installed safety rails as she made her way down the steps. She counted them in her mind, and it felt like a hundred tears fell from her eyes with every step.