Total pages in book: 96
Estimated words: 91783 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 91783 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 459(@200wpm)___ 367(@250wpm)___ 306(@300wpm)
Every line’s lit. The show’s the best it’s been in weeks.
“You’re on The Love Line.”
“My ex is back. We were engaged, he destroyed us, and now he’s two years sober and says he’s a different man and wants another shot.”
“People can change. You’re talking to someone who is proof. I was selfish and I was scared and I ran off from the best thing I ever had.” That’s as far as I take it. “Here’s what you need to ask. Is he proving it, or just saying it? Sober’s real work, so give him that much. But pay attention to his actions. And the first time he reaches for the old version of the man he used to be, you show him the door.”
“Thanks, Liam. I think I know what I need to do.”
I take the next call.
“You’re on The Love Line.”
“I want to propose, but I can’t afford the ring she deserves. Do I wait until I can?” He sounds young and very nervous.
“A ring is a promise and a token of love. I don’t even know when the practice started, but maybe you be the one that changes. Buy her what you can and then you work to get something different later. She may surprise you and fall in love with the one you slip on her finger because it’s something you picked for her.”
After that call, we take a break and play some music. I refill my coffee, use the bathroom, and tell Paige not to get any ideas about a ring.
She laughs and something tells me I’m in for it with her. I sit back down and press the button.
“You’re on The Love Line.”
“My boyfriend won’t say I love you back. It’s been a year.”
“Does he show it?”
“…He fixed my car. Twice. He walks my dog in the rain.”
“He’s saying it in a language you’re not recognizing as words. Ask him for the words too. But don’t miss the ones he’s already handing you.”
I handle a few more calls and am shocked to see the board all lit up. There’s no break. Then it comes up on the second screen. NO NAME. And Bex’s voice changes, careful with it. “Older gentleman. Says he’s called before. Won’t leave a name.” She waits. “Your call. I can cut him loose.”
The line blinks. Bex stares at me through the glass. Paige watches me over the top of her laptop. All I have to do is nod. He’s a dial tone. He goes back to wherever he is, I finish my show and drive home.
I don’t nod.
“Put him through.”
Bex holds my eyes through the glass. I nod anyway. She puts him through.
“You’re on The Love Line.” My voice comes out easy, smooth.
“It’s me,” he says. Slower than before. Rougher. “You know that by now.”
“I know it.”
“I won’t keep you.” A wet breath. “I called to tell you I’m done calling.”
“You’ve called three times.” Something in my voice goes hard. “Every time you tell me you’re going to do the hard thing, and every time you don’t. So do it, or don’t. But quit practicing on me.”
“You’re right. I’ve been practicing.” No fight in him at all, which is worse. “It’s the only nerve I ever had. But I’m out of the time I’d need to get brave. The doctors gave me a number, and it’s come and gone.”
“Then say it to him.” The host is still in the chair, and the host has a job. “Not to me. Not to a phone receiver. He’s the one who’s meant to hear it.”
“He won’t take my call. He’s got no reason to.” Another of those breaths. “This is the only door left, and I don’t even believe he’s behind it. I think I’m talking to a kind stranger and letting myself pretend it’s him, because the pretending is the last thing I’ve got that still works.”
I should cut him off. Go to break, kill the line, any of the ten things a professional does when a call comes apart on live air. My hands stay where they are.
“So here it is,” he says. “I had a son. A good one. Better than I had any right to make. And I broke him for sport, because I couldn’t stand that he was softer than me and stronger than me at the same time. I did it on purpose. For years. I called it making him a man.” His voice drops to almost nothing. “It was jealousy. A grown man jealous of a boy. My boy.”
Here it is. The first true thing he’s ever said about what he did. I’ve wanted it for thirty years. Now that it’s in the air it changes nothing at all. It also changes everything. Both at once, and I can’t pull them apart.
Through the glass Bex is on her feet, I hold my hand up. I move my head, barely, no. Paige is by my side, holding my hand.