Total pages in book: 107
Estimated words: 103431 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 517(@200wpm)___ 414(@250wpm)___ 345(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103431 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 517(@200wpm)___ 414(@250wpm)___ 345(@300wpm)
The sight I’m met with in the living room nearly brings me to my knees.
My big, strong, selfless man is on the couch with a blanket wrapped around his shoulders, hunched forward with his head between his knees. “You’re safe. You’re safe. You’re safe.” He murmurs the words over and over and over again, almost as if he’s in a trance.
“Ellis.” I keep my voice calm as I approach him. “Talk to me.”
“Scarlet?” He looks up at me, blinking rapidly, as if coming out of a daze.
“I’m here,” I say as yet another boom of thunder shakes the house. He flinches and shoves his head back between his legs just in time for another flash lightning to light up the sky. “I’ve got you.”
I position myself between his legs, noting the way his whole-body tremors as I run my fingers though his hair, trying to calm him. “How can I help you?”
“Just...” He wraps his arms around my legs, burying his face in my thighs. “Just hold me. Please.” His voice is raw in a way I’ve never heard before—not small but definitely broken.
“For as long as you need,” I promise him. “But maybe let’s do this in a way we’re both comfy and secure?”
“Yeah, yes. Sorry.” He sucks in a shuddering breath as the storm continues raging outside, forcing himself to sit up straight.
I waste no time, climbing into his lap side saddle style, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Talk to me, Ellis. What’s going on?”
“Don’t like storms.” He mumbles the words against the top of my head.
“I gathered that.” I draw mindless patterns on the back of his neck.
A low rumble of thunder, the kinds that seems to go on forever, gives way to driving rain, causing Ellis to clench around me, his entire body strung tight like a bow.
“I’ve got you,” I reassure him. “You’re inside, safe, with me.”
“My dad,” he starts, voice shaking with effort. “He, uh, he...”
“Take your time, Sunshine.” I drag my nails across his scalp, and he pushes into my touch like a needy kitten.
“I didn’t know it was going to storm.” He changes the topic, seemingly out of nowhere. “I-I usually know ahead of time and prepare.”
“Prepare how?”
He shrugs. “Weather radio, flashlight, all the curtains shut, a weighted blanket.”
“I can shut the curtains if you want.”
He shakes his head. “I’d rather you be my weighted blanket.”
“I can do that.” I tug the throw blanket he had around his shoulders, pulling it from behind him and draping it over the both of us. “For as long as you need.”
“What if I said forever?”
“Then I’d say forever and a day.”
“I love you, Scarlet.” He clings to me like I’m his lifeline, and while I hate seeing him so scared, I love being able to be strong for him.
He’s been relentless in his pursuit of my safety, so if I can offer even a sliver of the comfort he’s given me, then I’ll do it.
“I love you, too. So much.” I kiss his neck, holding him close. “Do you... do you want to finish what you were saying about your dad? No pressure, though.”
He doesn’t answer right away, leaving only the sound of our breathing and the storm outside to keep us company.
“It was my fault that my dad died.” His shoulders shake as he silently cries. “He died because of me.”
“I’m sure that’s not true.” I wish I could reassure him with my words alone, but I can’t. So, I settle in, determined to sit here with him for as long as it takes for him to feel safe, secure, and loved.
It’s still raining, but the wind, thunder, and lightning have all slacked off tremendously.
“I-I was seven. It had been a week of non-stop rain, and we finally had a patch of sun. I begged to go outside, and my parents were tired of me bouncing off the walls and being underfoot, so they agreed.” He sucks in another ragged breath, and I swear my heart breaks for this man. He’s so strong for everyone else. Who’s strong for him?
“I was out there for hours.” He huffs out a laugh, but it holds no humor. “Staged a whole battle in the mud with my Army men and Sauce—my stuffed rhino. Stayed outside until Mom called me in for dinner. I remember we had meatloaf—my favorite—so I ran inside when she called me. Forgot all about my Army men and Sauce. Until the storm rolled in. I begged Dad to get Sauce. Screamed and cried. He eventually agreed, threw on his raincoat and ran out to get him, but...”
“Take your time.” I snuggle in deeper to him, resting my head on his shoulder as he struggled to compose himself. “I’m not going anywhere. Not now, not ever.”
“He got struck by lightning. Went to cardiac arrest. Didn’t make it. We didn’t know until afterward that he had an enlarged heart and arrythmia. It was basically—fucking hell—it was a perfect storm.”