Total pages in book: 179
Estimated words: 170878 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 170878 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 854(@200wpm)___ 684(@250wpm)___ 570(@300wpm)
His voice was low, lyrical, calm as it always had been, but I knew Cole well enough to hear the anger in his tone. To feel the hurt underneath the anger.
I deserved it. All of the anger and hurt. I deserved to feel guilty and ashamed for cutting my friend out, although I was surprised. To see him here. He lived in New York. Had a whole new life, new friends. I knew this because I’d stalked his social media. I did that to make myself feel better for ignoring him. The big life he was living surely meant that he forgot his unfashionable, damaged childhood friend.
“Then I get a drunk text. I’m assuming it was drunk, given the amount of spelling mistakes and how forthright it was,” he continued. “A crash course in everything that’s been going on with you, otherwise known as a cry for help.”
My breath caught as I vaguely remembered my fingers flying rapidly over my phone, spewing out every detail of the past few months with Beau, desperate to share it with someone.
Cole. I’d texted Cole the whole complicated story, with my unvarnished feelings bursting out of it.
My feelings. For Beau.
My head renewed its pounding.
“I’m sorry.” I spoke quietly, struggling to swallow past the shame clogging my esophagus. “I thought you’d…”
“Forget you?” Cole finished for me, hands on his hips. “Give up on you?”
I pursed my lips, nodding slowly at him. I shouldn't have been surprised by his ability to pluck the thoughts right out of my brain. He knew me too well.
The look in his eyes—which had been sharp, biting—softened. “Girlfriend, you have had a lifetime of people giving up on you, making you believe you’re not worthy, so I’ll give you a little pass for believing that bullshit.” He held his pointer finger and thumb a few millimeters apart. “A little break. But you are also smart as fuck. Your grades reflect that, even if your marital status does not.”
“I can’t believe you’re here,” I exclaimed, instead of addressing what he just said. The last thing I needed to do was burst into tears.
“Yeah, you expected me to give up on you.” Cole shook his head.
I shook my own head. “It’s not that, I—”
“Banana? The brownies are ready. Hi!”
A warm presence pressed into my side.
Cole’s eyes traveled down to the small person in a pink tutu who had greeted him. They immediately lit up.
“Well, hello, gorgeous creature,” Cole replied.
“I’m Clara.” She introduced herself without an inch of shyness, holding out her hand.
Cole shook it dutifully. “I’m delighted to make your acquaintance.”
Clara looked at me. “Is he your friend?”
I nodded. “My oldest one.” I didn’t add that he was my only friend, not counting her.
Cole glared at me. “Excuse me, but I get Botox to ensure that no one calls me old,” he hissed.
“You don’t look old,” Clara told him, happily and truthfully. “Do you want some brownies?”
I opened my mouth to protest, not quite knowing how I was going to do that. Despite the complication of Cole’s presence, I was genuinely happy to see him. He was my oldest and best friend. He’d stood at my side at my wedding, even though he disagreed with my decision to get married. He celebrated every one of my wins, and he was there for me through the many lows of my life.
I’d felt alone in Jupiter, despite Clara’s presence, despite the women trying to welcome me. I was playing a part, hiding all the broken pieces of myself. Cole knew those parts and loved me anyway.
I desperately wanted Cole here. Even with his pissed-off gaze, I felt more comfortable. I wanted to eat brownies with him and Clara. I wanted him to know Clara, be in her presence. Wanted another person in my life to share in the memory of her when I was no longer her nanny.
There was just the small problem of Beau. I didn’t know how he’d react to having a man he didn’t know in his house.
No, I knew exactly how Beau would react.
He’d be furious.
Beau would be furious.
I did not want to be on the receiving end of his fury right then. Especially not with the moments we’d shared this morning and last night still lingering.
I had to stop this.
The problem was that Clara was already dragging Cole inside.
BEAU
There was a man in my house.
I’d heard the door; I would’ve answered it myself, but Hannah had beaten me to it. That irritated me. Not because I didn’t want her to feel at home. Precisely because it taunted me with the fact that this wasn’t her home. This place was temporary for her. We were temporary.
That was supposed to be a good thing. My balls would thank me when she left; they’d no longer be fucking bursting with need.
Yet the mere idea of her not being under my roof set my teeth on edge.