Total pages in book: 110
Estimated words: 107720 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 539(@200wpm)___ 431(@250wpm)___ 359(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 107720 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 539(@200wpm)___ 431(@250wpm)___ 359(@300wpm)
Wanted...not want.
Past tense. Acceptance.
If this was the last time we would ever be together, I wanted it to feel good not sad.
I wanted to die in his arms as pleasure ripped through me, not pain.
Reaching up to cup his handsome face, I ignored the gauntness, the bruises, the dark fatigue. “Kiss me, Lucien.”
He obeyed.
And we fell.
Chapter Thirty-Three
OUR PRIVATE SNOWY MEADOW WAS DYING.
The sky no longer danced with auroras, and petals no longer cascaded from the blossom tree. The river had dried up days ago, and each time we entered this place, the illusion cracked a little more.
We no longer made love in a perfect snow globe, but fought to survive in a rotten bubble about to pop.
The ache in my heart intensified as Lucien pinned me to the ground, his weight grounding and heavy and real. His hands framed my face almost too tightly as he kissed me—not sweet or soft but vicious with denial.
I kissed him back.
Our teeth clashed and tongues fought.
We kissed as if we could share our souls, hoping that when the time came, we could find each other again.
“I won’t lose you,” he growled against my lips. “I can’t.”
Tears slipped from my eyes, freezing against my skin as I pulled him closer. I dug my nails into him, anchoring him to me for always. I wanted to tell him he never would. To make vows and promises that we’d always be together, but...they would be lies.
Pieces of me were fading.
During the past week of subjecting ourselves to every test possible, I’d hidden the fact that my memories were cracking and vanishing. The sound of my mother’s laugh. The colour of my childhood bedroom. The faces of the girls I’d been trapped in Cinderkeep with. They’d all gone as if I didn’t need them where I was going.
Even the precious memories of Lucien weren’t safe. I knew I loved him, and I knew I met him in that black stone palace, but...I couldn’t recall how.
What was our first meeting like?
What had he said to me?
How was I supposed to stay with him and love him when everything about me was deleting itself—almost as if the ice was erasing everything that made me me.
Tears streamed down my temples as I clung to him, kissing him ever so deeply.
I tried to keep the truth from him, but the bond made it impossibly hard.
“You’re not fading,” he hissed between kisses. “I won’t let you. And we first met in the ballroom. I think I said how bold you were...not bowing like the others.” He nipped my bottom lip. “I fell for you even then. I fell the moment our eyes met, and I will never let you go.”
I cried out as the ice kept churning, calcifying my bones with frost. The tips of my hair dusted with snowflakes, breaking apart and rising into the air.
Horror squeezed my heart.
No. Not yet...
He growled at the sight of my hair trying to dissipate. His fury wrapped me in a warm cocoon, thawing me out just enough that my hair melted back to normal.
“You. Are. Mine.” He lowered his head and spoke against my throat, his teeth sharp against my skin. “Every piece of you. Every damn part of you is mine, and I’m not letting a single part of you leave me.”
Even as he vowed to keep me, another life thread snapped deep, deep inside.
The meadow dimmed as if it only existed because of us and if there was no more us...
His mouth captured mine again, tasting my tears.
“You don’t get to say goodbye,” he breathed, deepening the kiss until I surrendered entirely to him. “I will never let you say that word to me, got it?”
I closed my eyes and held him tighter, memorising the feel of him, the heat of him, the way his fire surrounded my ice and held it at bay from hurting me.
I tried to believe him, but all my terrors spilled free. “I think we’re really running out of time, Lucien.”
His face darkened as he pulled away and cupped my cheeks. “Don’t say that. Frank is busy. He’s still working while we’re here healing. He’ll find something.”
“But what if he can’t?” My voice cracked. “I know you feel it too. The weight inside us. The sickness—”
He made a low, broken sound and kissed me again. His mouth claimed mine like he could seal us together for eternity and I kissed him back with the same ferocity.
We didn’t speak again. We couldn’t.
Our clothes dissolved and our skin met skin.
The moment he pushed inside me—slow and deep and achingly gentle—the dreamscape flared with light as if reacting to our connection.
Silver frost bloomed across my breasts, only to melt instantly under the heat of his body. His smoky wings unfurled only to be swallowed up by snow.
Every thrust was reverent and tender.