Total pages in book: 16
Estimated words: 14597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 73(@200wpm)___ 58(@250wpm)___ 49(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 14597 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 73(@200wpm)___ 58(@250wpm)___ 49(@300wpm)
“Jax…” I begin, but I’m stunned into silence when he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a diamond ring.
“I love you, Willow,” he says, his eyes locked with mine. “We could get married and adopt a couple of kids. I make enough money. We could have a house full of kids if that’s what you wanted.”
A golf ball-sized lump blocks my airpipe. I can’t talk or swallow or even breathe. I told him what I wanted, and he said okay. So, why is he doing this now?
I scamper off his lap and stand, crossing my arms over my chest and willing myself not to cry. “I told you I didn’t want to get married or have kids. You know this. Why are you doing this? You’re ruining everything.”
Jax leans forward, and gripping me by my hips, pulls me back into his lap. “Willow, I know what you said, but I saw the look in your eyes today. You can’t tell me deep down you don’t want that. The marriage, the kids, the family.”
“Is that what you want?” I ask.
“I want whatever you want.” He takes my face in his hands and kisses me softly before he pulls back. “This ring isn’t a proposal.”
When I give him a confused look, he continues, “I’m okay with what we have. I’m more than okay with it. I love you and I love our life together. But I need you to know that if you ever change your mind, if you ever want more, I want to be the one to give that to you.”
He takes my hand in his and opens it up, so my palm is facing up. Then, he places the ring in the center. “I bought this ring because I want you to know I love our todays, but I also want your tomorrows. If you never decide to put it on, that’s okay. I’ll still be here. Always.”
He pulls a chain out of the box and loops the ring through the chain. Then he puts it around my neck and links it together. He leans forward and kisses the ring, which is resting against my chest. “I love you, Willow.”
Tears burn my eyelids and then fall down my cheeks. Jax uses his thumbs to wipe them up before he kisses me again. The kiss is intense, as if he’s trying to convey through his lips and tongue how much he loves me. And I let him. I get lost in our kiss until our lips are numb and our bodies are entangled in one another. We shed our clothes until we’re both naked and then Jax makes love to me, whispering how much he loves me and needs me. And it hits me that somewhere along the way I stopped living for today and started looking forward to tomorrow.
And with that thought, I want to run, because looking forward to tomorrow is scary. It means I’m feeling. Letting someone in. It means I’m setting myself and him up for heartbreak when something goes wrong.
As if he can feel me drifting, Jax pushes himself into me deeper, and his lips finds my ear. “You’re not going anywhere, Willow. You’re going to stay right here with me and live for today.”
“Jax,” I whimper, finding my release.
He grunts out his own release then stills. “No, baby. If we never get married, that’s okay. I just need you to know that whatever you want, I will make sure you have it. Always.”
He rolls off me and pulls me into his arms, my back against his chest. His scruffy face nuzzles into my neck, and when his breathing evens out, I know he’s asleep.
I consider leaving. Running. And I should. He might not have officially proposed, but it’s still a proposal. There’s a ring hanging from my neck with the promise of tomorrow.
But instead of running, I snuggle back into Jax and close my eyes, needing him to hold me while I figure out what to do next.
CHAPTER TEN
JAX
Present Day
“I remember when I gave you that ring.” I find myself grinning at the memory. “I thought for sure I was going to wake up and you would be gone. But you weren’t.”
Willow smiles. “I considered it, but I loved you too much to let you go.”
“But you didn’t say yes,” I say, remembering the next morning when we woke up.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
JAX
Nine and a Half Years Ago
“My answer is no,” Willow tells me, holding the ring and necklace out to me.
“I didn’t ask you to marry me,” I say, taking a bite of my cereal. “I told you when you want to, I’ll be here. That ring is for you to wear around your neck as a reminder of how much I love you, and one day, if or when you’re ready, I hope you’ll wear it on your finger.”