Total pages in book: 331
Estimated words: 315585 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1578(@200wpm)___ 1262(@250wpm)___ 1052(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 315585 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1578(@200wpm)___ 1262(@250wpm)___ 1052(@300wpm)
I failed her. The one person that I was supposed to give my life for ended up giving hers for me. Before I left Carnage, Ty’s men informed me they still hadn’t found Evan. I’ve given up. The bastard won. He took my girl from me.
I went a little mad and killed some prisoners and then bolted. I found myself at that bar, and then after I got my ass kicked, I crawled to the motel next door and locked myself in room 111. Where I’ve been rotting away.
It felt right. This is where I belong. I spent so many nights following her here. Watching her kill men. If only she would have taken me with her.
I long to see her, hold her, and hear her voice one last time. The thought has me glancing at her phone on the nightstand. Adam, Bill, the wives…everyone has her number because she had become part of their lives. I’ve kept it off because I don’t want anyone to call looking for me, knowing I have it. But it can help me with one thing…
Getting up, I walk over to the side of the bed, plop down, and pick up the motel room phone, dialing her number.
Her voicemail picks up and I hold my breath.
“Hey, Kash,” comes her soft voice and a lump forms in my throat. I tried calling her several times when we were rushing to Barrington, but the moment her voicemail picked up, I ended the call.
“I wanted to leave you one last message. Just in case you thought to check.”
I slap my free hand over my mouth to quiet the sob so I can hear her speak.
“I’m sitting here at Barrington, looking over the empty school. I’m trying to get my thoughts together. I have to call you to say goodbye, and it breaks my heart. To leave you. But just in case it comes down to life and death, I choose to die for a cause. For you. I love you, Kashton. And if there’s a God, I thank him for sending me you. My biggest regret is running away that night on the Isabella. Not because of me, but because that’s six years you went without knowing you were loved. I took that from you and I’m sorry. I wish…” Her voice cracks, and I swallow nervously. “This is the only way I can repay you for loving me when everyone in my life always made me feel worthless. You gave me a purpose, and I’m honored to be your angel in this chaotic world.” She sniffs, and I close my eyes, hating that she’s hurting. “I have been at war with myself all my life. Until you…Kashton Landon Pierce, my Lord. You helped me find peace. And this is something that I could never repay you for. Your mother would be proud of the man you’ve become, Kash. And I’m lucky to have been loved by you.” She pauses, and I close my eyes when I hear her whisper, “I love you, Kash.”
I find myself back on the bench at the end of the bed, rocking back and forth. I listened to her voicemail more times than I can count. My sadness has turned to anger.
She knew what she was going to do when she called and said goodbye. I would have gone with her. Fought next to her. We could have died side by side. I’d never make her go alone.
Reaching out, I pick up her wedding ring. I curl my fingers around it and close my eyes. I made her a promise, and I intend to keep it. I won’t fail her again.
My plan when I woke up from the beating I got was that I’d just jump on my bike and drive it until I lost control, but that would put others on the road with me at risk as well. I don’t want to hurt anyone. Not anymore. Plus, the bikers at the bar beat the fuck out of my bike with crowbars after they were done with me. So I now have no transportation. Not like I need to go anywhere anyway.
I set the ring down, pick up my revolver, and remove all the bullets except one. Then I spin the cylinder and shut it. It’s the same one my father gave me for my initiation. Who knew one day I’d need it. “Keep it. Maybe one day you’ll put it to good use.”
I’m not even nervous or scared. I’ve made up my mind. I left a note for my brothers. They’ll understand. They would do the same if they lost their wives. They have each other. They don’t need me.
Picking the ring up again, I hold it in my left hand. Then I bring the barrel of the gun to my right temple.