Total pages in book: 141
Estimated words: 128313 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 642(@200wpm)___ 513(@250wpm)___ 428(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 128313 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 642(@200wpm)___ 513(@250wpm)___ 428(@300wpm)
My hand balled into a fist, so tight my bones clicked with the pressure. I recalled her jumping. The freedom she held in her body as she left the ground, the partnership she had with Huxley, and her quiet grace as she rode around the ring was like nothing I’d ever seen.
Suddenly an image of her riding Henry popped into my head. He’d let her fuss him. I’d never seen anyone work with horses like she did. And I could only imagine the hidden talents she could pull from Henry if she rode him.
My head pounded. I was trapped in an impossible situation. I wanted Hallie more than I wanted to fucking breathe. Now I’d had a taste of her, I needed more. I craved her in a way I hadn’t craved anything in my life. I wanted to taste her again, fuck her and feel her pulse around me, hear her scream as I tied her up and made her fall apart. But I also wanted to feel her soft hair in my hands, to kiss her softly. For fuck’s sake, I wanted to fall asleep beside her. Wake up next to her.
I’d never felt that before in my entire life.
But what if being with me hurt her?
But what if being close to her meant you could protect her more? my internal voice asked.
I’d watched her yesterday on the big screen. Before she jumped, the jumbotron had shown her waiting to ride next. The fear on her face had been my undoing. Like she had a damn lasso tied round my heart, I’d run to her. Said Fuck you to my anonymity and gone to her side. And I’d seen what my presence did for her—it calmed her, soothed her. Just like she did to me.
Are you going to spend all your life being scared? Forrest’s words circled my head. I had been. For as much as I liked to be in charge, living like nothing much fazed me, I had spent the past year being shit-scared of life. Of losing anyone else I loved.
The thought of Hallie being hurt because of me . . . I jumped to my feet, unable to sit there anymore. I was crawling out of my skin. I started when I saw the arena lights had been switched off while I’d been spiraling. Will was waiting outside the private box when I opened the door. Due to the many meetings I’d been having and moving around Doha more than expected, Will had been assigned to trail me personally. It was probably a wise move, considering all that was happening. I fucking hated that I had to have private security, but that was just the way it was.
“I’m going back to the hotel,” I said, and Will nodded, murmuring into his radio for the car to be brought around. I just needed to get back to my room and think. I needed space, and I needed to do what was right.
I stopped in the hallway midstep and asked, “Has there been any sign of trouble since we arrived in Doha, Will? Any threats?”
“None, sir,” he said, and that settled something in my chest. I nodded, then headed down the elevator to the car. The entire drive back, I tried to convince myself that being with Hallie wasn’t the right thing to do. She had just exploded onto the scene. In the past few days, I’d seen article upon article about her and Sage and the future of Golden Oaks and Team Knighton with the arrival of such flawless talents.
I didn’t want to affect that in any way.
As I entered the hotel, a familiar laugh had me turning to the bar. Atticus was there, talking to a gaggle of women as per usual. My cousin was crack to eager pussy. Walking toward him, I placed a hand on his shoulder. He turned and his face split into a happy smile. “Jasper!” He hugged me.
For just one fucking day, I would love to be Atticus. The way he viewed life . . . All of us Knightons took the piss out of his extroverted, easygoing nature, but the truth was, I envied him. To Atti, life was just one big party.
“Good ride tonight,” I said.
“You came?” he asked, eyebrow raised. Atticus signaled to the bartender, and in seconds, a scotch was in my hands. “You know,” Atticus said, “having you gone from the circuit means I’m going to clean up!” He clinked his glass to mine in celebration, the little shit. I rolled my eyes and knocked back my scotch, feeling its burn ache in my esophagus and slamming the empty glass back on the bar top.
Atticus frowned, losing his humor, then said, “I’m joking, you know? I’m just taking the piss.” He sighed, and in a rare moment of seriousness, Atticus leaned in close and said, “Truth is, Jas, I miss you. It was always me, you, and Genny on the circuit. For as long as I can remember.” I saw the pain shining in his dark eyes. “I love Hals and Sage, but . . . it felt different today, not having you guys beside me. My family. My blood. It was always us Knightons, riding together, you know? I’m a friggin’ lone wolf now.”