Total pages in book: 97
Estimated words: 93929 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 93929 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 470(@200wpm)___ 376(@250wpm)___ 313(@300wpm)
I gasp, eyes going wide. I wanted it, but it’s still a surprise. His grip is firm, but not choking. I lean into it, needing more, but he knows what he’s doing. This is a man who can use his hands. He drives faster, deeper, his hips slamming into mine as he takes me over and over. I moan, whimpering and wiggling, holding onto his wrist and staring into his eyes. This is what I deserve, it’s what I need, this is all I’ve ever been: worthless, despicable, beyond redemption.
“You’re beautiful, Caroline,” he says and those words are like a spike in my core. “You’re so fucking sexy it breaks me. Every inch of you ruins me. I can’t control myself much longer.”
Oh, god, the idea that he’s losing himself, that he’s going to come too, that slams me through a glass wall. I arch into his hand, wanting it tighter, needing more pressure on my throat as he fucks me wildly, and I feel it building, all my hate and anger, all my rage and self-loathing, until he bites my lip.
“Fuck, Caroline, I need you,” he whispers.
And I shatter.
God, I come so hard, I nearly black out. I can’t tell if it’s from the orgasm or from him choking me, and I don’t care. My brain’s on fire. It’s ecstasy, it’s bliss, there’s something angelic and divine about the way my world completely unravels for him. And just as I think I’m going to tunnel into nothing, his hands move away from my throat and he thrusts in deep, moaning his own finish. I feel him, warm and steady and strong, filling me to the very brim.
We stay like that, gasping and sweaty. It’s always so damn warm in here by the pool. He kisses me, kisses my throat where he gripped, kisses my lips and breasts. Each kiss brings a fresh shiver to my spine.
“Such a good girl,” he whispers, right next to my ear. Our bodies are tangled and loose. I’ve never been so relaxed before.
“I feel like I just lost weight.” I laugh, giddy and stupid. “What the heck just happened?”
“I think you’re shedding something.” He touches my neck. “I think that’s why you want me to choke you. That’s why you want me to call you fucked up.”
“Therapy sex.”
“Something like that.” He pulls me tighter. “But you don’t need that. You’re right where you belong with me.”
I bite back a retort. Isn’t this supposed to be temporary? He doesn’t need me to ruin the moment, and honestly, I don’t really want to.
I’d rather just believe him.
23
FINN
The Whelan house feels quiet. I’m not sure what it is. I linger in the entryway, frowning down the silent hallways.
Years ago, this place was a madhouse. Even as big as it is, my brothers and I managed to fill it with constant chaos. There were clan members coming and going, my father’s business littering the various front rooms, while we ran rampant through the upstairs and the living spaces. Mom was always cooking. There was laughter and more than a few fights.
It was alive.
Some of that’s coming back. The wives are having babies and children breathe fresh air into the place. But I doubt it’ll ever be the same. Declan just doesn’t run the clan the way Dad used to. He’s much more controlling, much more reserved and serious, while our father was more of a friendly politician.
I almost mourn it. Those were good days. Except for the summer when my parents sent me away and I became what I am today.
Declan and Seamus are waiting for me in the office. This used to be my father’s, overflowing with old treasures and mementos from a long life, but now it’s Declan’s space. He’s always been an obsessive tight-ass and this place reflects that perfectly. There’s not a single book out of place and all the photographs are neatly arranged by year. Drop a pin on the floor and he’d notice.
“We were just talking about that new mixed-use project going up downtown. You know, the cursed one?” Seamus grins as I sit in the chair next to him.
“How’s it cursed?”
“Well, a fucking generator exploded and killed a guy, so, you know.” His grin gets even bigger. “By the way, how many dead brothers-in-law are you at now?”
“Leave it alone, Seamus,” Declan says, only half paying attention. He’s flipping through a spreadsheet and frowning at the numbers.
“I’m just saying, I’m happy we’re blood related. Otherwise I’m not sure I’d survive the day.” Seamus pretends to hang himself and cackles with delight.
I grin right back. Most of the time, I don’t have to pretend around him. Seamus gets me better than the others do. He still thinks I’m some overeager idiot quick with a joke and happy to take on whatever job the family throws at me, and that’s fine, but at least he knows there’s a fire down beneath all that.