Total pages in book: 152
Estimated words: 147545 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 738(@200wpm)___ 590(@250wpm)___ 492(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 147545 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 738(@200wpm)___ 590(@250wpm)___ 492(@300wpm)
I can’t breathe properly.
Woodenly, I turn around and walk through the kitchen. I stop and look at the entryway. I avoided it earlier. Came in the back door so I didn’t have to see it.
I walk across the stretch of floor where Tim’s body fell, then I go up the stairs.
But I don’t go to Tor’s room.
I go to Tim’s.
I’m practically wheezing by the time I get there, the effort it takes to breathe becoming a little too much. Maybe I should just stop trying because if what she said is true…
It isn’t.
It can’t be.
You know the truth.
The forceful insistence of my fracturing mind doesn’t make me feel any better, though.
I stare at Tim’s bed. It isn’t made. The sheets are still rumpled like he just climbed out of it this morning. Maybe no one could bring themselves to come into this room since he died, or maybe they left it the way he did for sentimental reasons.
Because they miss him.
He was taken from them.
Oh my god. What have I done?
I shake my head, tears welling up in my eyes, rejecting the unacceptable possibility that surfaces in my mind.
I want to lie down in the bed like I did last summer just to see what happens. Smells can trigger memories, and the pillow probably still smells like him. If it triggers the memories, I can… I can relive it and reassure myself that I’m remembering everything correctly.
It’s too horrifying to think I could have possibly been wrong. I can’t be wrong about this. I can’t be.
Nina’s lying. It’s the only explanation. Nothing else makes sense.
Except Tim had an identical twin brother.
“No,” I say out loud, shaking my head, tears welling up in my eyes as I reject that possibility with my whole heart. “No, no, no.”
No, because that’s fucking crazy. I know Tor, and Nina is the liar here. She has to be.
She has to be because if she isn’t…
“Oh my god.”
I suck in a breath, then another, but I’m starting to panic.
I’m starting to feel lightheaded.
I can’t get enough air.
I claw at the chest of this tight fucking dress. I want to tear it off. I need to tear it off. I can’t breathe.
The door opens behind me.
“Cassie?”
The sound of his voice makes my heart slam against my ribs, a frantic, trapped thing.
I can’t breathe.
Panic floods me more forcefully as I turn and my gaze lands on Tor.
His blue eyes lock on me immediately, registering my unraveling, but not understanding why it’s happening. He sees my struggle to draw enough breath. He looks confused. He looks a little panicked himself as he tries to quickly ascertain what’s going on here.
But he doesn’t look like a monster.
He looks like the man who has made me love him.
What if he isn’t who I think he is?
His own father called him a snake. What if I’m wrong about him?
I shake my head, my face crumpling. I don’t want to believe that. I can’t.
But what if it’s true?
“Cassie, what happened?” he asks, taking a step toward me.
I hold up a hand to stop him as he reaches for me. “Don’t.”
He stops, his hand hovering in the air between us. “Why did you come in here?”
“I’m trying to remember.”
He doesn’t have to ask what I’m trying to remember.
His eyes harden, and he takes another step toward me, but I back up.
“Why would you do that?” he asks quietly. “You can’t breathe. Come on, let’s get you out of here.” He reaches for my arm, but I jerk it back before he can make contact.
“Don’t touch me.”
He stops dead in his tracks. His stare doesn’t leave me, but his confusion turns into something else. Wariness. “Cassie, why are you looking at me like that?”
“Was it you?” I ask quietly, terrified to meet his gaze. Horrified of what I might see if I do.
Carefully, he asks, “What are you talking about?”
I can’t ask again, so I ask something different. “Did you fuck Nina the night of that party last summer?”
It feels like a long shot, frankly. I’m grasping at straws. That doesn’t make any more sense than what Nina said. She said it was Tim, and I guess there’s a chance she couldn’t tell them apart, but…
What if I’m the one who made that mistake?
The thought punches the remaining breath right out of my lungs, and I double over, clutching my stomach.
Tor tries to approach me again, but I shout, “No. I said don’t fucking touch me!”
He raises his hands in surrender and takes a step back, the same way he did the night Tim died.
The night I killed him.
The last time my mind unraveled inside this house, but not the first.
“Cassie…” Tor licks his lips, catching my gaze and holding it. “There are people downstairs, so you need to be quiet.”
I suck in a shuddering breath. “Have you and I been in this room together before?” I ask him. “Did you come into this bedroom when I was asleep in Tim’s bed? Did you rape me, Tor?”