Total pages in book: 136
Estimated words: 132951 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 665(@200wpm)___ 532(@250wpm)___ 443(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 132951 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 665(@200wpm)___ 532(@250wpm)___ 443(@300wpm)
“What if he doesn’t get his head out of his ass? I feel so stupid for falling in love.”
Flip stops rocking. “For one, you’re not stupid, Dred. You’re one of the smartest people I know, so be nice to my best friend or else.”
I huff a laugh and give him a look. “I fell for your nemesis.”
“I hate that he’s hurt you. I hate that he’s actually a nice guy behind all the bullshit. I hate that his fear reaction is to be cruel. And I hate that I might end up breaking his face because he’s too much of a numpty to own his feelings for you. But of course you fell for the guy everyone loves to tear down who also just wants to make his grandma happy. He did everything in his power to try to make you happy, too. We all saw it. I saw it. It would be hard not to like him for that.” He shrugs. “Plus you have wicked chemistry.”
“So I’m not losing my mind? He has feelings for me?”
Flip nods. “Like you said, he just doesn’t know how to handle them, and he’s being an idiot.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t ask for help,” I whisper.
“Me too, but I understand why you didn’t.” He wraps his arm around my shoulder and squeezes me. “I wish my shit hadn’t gotten in the way of that. Then maybe your heart wouldn’t be broken.”
“I guess you and I get to be divorcees together, huh?” I joke.
He huffs a humorless laugh. “There’s some real irony here, isn’t there? I married Fiona in secret, thinking we would spend our lives together, and all she wanted was the money. You and Connor got married based on a contract but ended up falling for real.”
“And here we both are.”
“Here we both are,” he agrees.
Flip married his high school sweetheart in his last semester of university. He was headed for the pros after graduation. They’d dated in high school and had broken up when they went to different universities, but they’d reconnected in their final year. He loved her and wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.
They’d kept their marriage a secret, not wanting their parents to talk them into waiting until they’d graduated. And then a few months in, Flip realized she was only in it for the lifestyle it would afford her. It was an expensive, painful lesson—one he learned on his own. I’m the only person who knows. Not even Tristan or his sister are aware that he was married, or that he basically handed Fiona his first year’s salary to get her out of his life.
“I want a family, Flip.”
“I’m your family.”
“I want kids, though. I love being an aunty to Callie and Fee, and to Lexi and Roman’s little one who will be here soon, and all the other Terror babies that are yet to come. But I want my own kids. They don’t have to be biologically mine. I wanted to keep the twins so badly at Christmas. For a moment I imagined I could.” I believed Connor and I could. “But what if I’m too broken to be good for them?”
“You’re not. You’re an incredible, resilient, amazing person, and you have so much love to give,” he assures me.
“I also have actual savings now. I donated some of it to the library and a few charities, but most of the money is still there.” It’s socked away into investments and GICs because I didn’t know what else to do with it.
“We can talk to Rix,” Flip says. “She’ll help you with the financial side.”
“I started the foster parent application process last year. I didn’t have the finances to support it then, but I do now. I know Victor and Everly will age out in the next few years, but I could still love them. I could be their soft place to land. I can give them a home they can always come back to.”
Flip hugs me. “You would be great for them. Tell me how I can help, and I’ll do everything in my power to make this happen for you.”
CHAPTER 47
CONNOR
I’d gotten used to feeling like part of the team, but now I’m back where I started when I first joined the Terror. On the outs. The problem.
Madden has been firing eyeball daggers at me the entire practice. Even Stiles and Bright, who usually don’t take sides, are stonewalling me. Coach Vander Zee seems to think my on-ice issues have everything to do with the Grace family scandal that’s making headlines. My mother is on the verge of a nervous breakdown and has been staying with Portia and Bryson. Isabelle has gone into hiding and refuses to leave the house. I wish I was less surprised by the whole thing. It’s not as high on my radar as it should be, though, because my own life is in shambles. My teammates know, but other than Meems, my family is unaware.