Series: Cobalt Empire Series by Krista Ritchie
Total pages in book: 220
Estimated words: 215301 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1077(@200wpm)___ 861(@250wpm)___ 718(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 215301 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1077(@200wpm)___ 861(@250wpm)___ 718(@300wpm)
Turning to my parents, I tell them, “What Phoenix and I are doing—it’s not taking away from our aspirations for the band. It’s all intertwined. And we shouldn’t be standing trial for just hooking up.”
My mom’s pinpointed, fact-finding eyes dart from me to Phoenix, then back to me.
Whereas my dad holds up a calming hand. “You’re not standing trial,” he says. “But it is unlike you.”
Yeah. Considering Phoenix is the only bandmate I’ve ever made more than just music with, I can see how that’d set off alarm bells.
Weight hasn’t left my chest. I want to tell them I have feelings for Phoenix. I want to tell them it’s deeper than some rushed, surface-level hookup that can exit my life with no consequence. Because if Phoenix exits, the loss of him will feel like claws ripping across my flesh.
I open my mouth, but I only release a staggered breath. Regardless of what I feel for him, we’re putting our energy into the tour, not into a relationship.
My mom points a hostile matte black nail at me. “You’re being safe?”
“Yeah, yeah.” I find my voice. “We do it between bubble wrap and crash pads.” I wave Phoenix on to add more.
He tilts his head. “Oh, you want me to lie to your parents?”
“I want you to embellish.”
“Right,” Phoenix grips the counter behind me. “I roll Tom in a tarp and put on a hazmat suit. It’s very practical.”
“Very,” I add with a smile, just staring at Phoenix as his lips curve upward. His hand falls off the counter and just barely brushes against my back. I wish it would stay there.
Audrey contains her growing smile, and Mom is clinking her nails against the counter.
All the embellishments award me a parental lecture about consensual sex, PrEP, condoms, and as soon as lube comes out of my mom’s mouth, I butt in, “Okay, let’s not do this, actually.” I clap my hands together. “It’s been fun, but I have some party things to iron out.”
By Phoenix’s nonreaction, I’m guessing they already discussed protection in the lobby.
Mortified.
And yet, my dad says diplomatically, “If you’re embarrassed to talk about safe sex, then you shouldn’t be having sex at all.”
“Yeah, agreed,” I nod. “But I’m more embarrassed about being treated like a teenager who needs the lecture.”
“I’m not trying to patronize you.”
“It’s coming across a little bit patronizing.” I make a winced face. “Or are you just assuming I don’t listen to you? Which I have listened to your safe sex talks throughout my whole life. And if you think I have a terrible memory, then well—that sucks too because I don’t.”
“I know you don’t,” my dad professes.
“We care about your well-being,” my mom says fiercely. “You should prepare to be pestered by me for the rest of your life and beyond the grave. Because I will never tire in my pursuit of keeping you safe.”
Phoenix has a soft smile on the floor.
It makes me ease up. “Yeah, okay. I appreciate the heavy artillery, Mom.” I’m trying to, at least. It just feels like a knock on my own abilities. My artillery is well-stocked, thank you.
Phoenix pushes off the counter and says to my mom, “I know you and Mr. Cobalt—”
“You can call me Connor,” my dad interjects, sounding friendly. But this is not an actual olive branch. My dad lets everyone use his middle name so their guards drop around him. It’s calculated.
“Connor,” Phoenix says. “I know my parents keep in touch with you both, and I’d appreciate it if you could not tell them about me and Tom.”
My frown deepens.
Audrey appears sad on my behalf, which is making this more depressing.
“Why?” My mom’s eyes flame. “Do your parents take umbrage at you being gay? I didn’t think Miriam did, but if Philippe…” She turns to my dad for answers, but he’s observing Phoenix.
“No, no,” Phoenix says fast. “They’re both very supportive. It has nothing to do with that.”
“Then what’s the issue?” my dad asks.
“They already believe Tom might replace me midtour at his whim, and if they find out that I’m…that we’re…you know.”
“Having sex,” Mom says curtly.
Phoenix blushes. He cuts me a shut the fuck up glare, but I’m already grinning. He rakes his hands through his hair again. “They’ll think Tom will drop me as soon as his feelings change.”
My grin vanishes. I’m shaking my head profusely. “Phoenix—”
“I know.” He touches my hand at our sides, as if to say, you wouldn’t do that to me. I know.
I try to relax.
He expresses to my parents, “They mean well, but I just don’t want them up my ass this entire tour. The less they know about me and Tom, the better.”
“We’ll keep this to ourselves,” my mom assures, then turns to my dad.
He slips a hand against the small of her back. “We’re happy to help. Especially while you’re both on tour together.”