Total pages in book: 117
Estimated words: 108362 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 542(@200wpm)___ 433(@250wpm)___ 361(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 108362 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 542(@200wpm)___ 433(@250wpm)___ 361(@300wpm)
“My angel, my all, my very self. Only a few words today and at that with pencil (with yours). Not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon,” Ozzie said, reading from a tablet open in front of him. Shannon’s eyes lifted when I stepped into the room, connecting with mine as her friend continued reading, “What a useless waste of time. Why this deep sorrow when necessity speaks. Can our love endure except through sacrifices, through not demanding everything from one another; can you change the fact that you are not wholly mine, I not wholly thine.”
“Jace,” Shannon said, a catch in her voice while the words rang in my ears. I couldn’t place them yet their sentiment had my chest tightening in a vicelike squeeze. They expressed something I hadn’t been able to put into words about how I felt for Shannon. Especially that last line. She had been wholly mine once, but not anymore. Perhaps never again, and that was the most gut-wrenching part.
I cleared my throat, finally dragging my gaze away from hers. “Zara’s upstairs. Um, we used her key. I hope that’s okay.”
“That’s fine. Did she have a good time with Elias and Roan?”
“Yeah, she had fun. Sorry for interrupting. I’ll get going.”
I gave each of her friends a brief nod of acknowledgment before turning to leave when Ozzie said, “Why don’t you join us?”
The question had me pausing for a beat as my gaze fell on Shannon. I tried gauging her reaction, but she gave nothing away. A part of me wanted to stay, but another part didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable. I arched a subtle eyebrow at her that asked, You okay with this? She gave the smallest nod in return, though I couldn’t tell if it was a resigned nod or an easy-going one. In the end, the part that wanted to stick around turned back to Ozzie and replied, “Sure, I’d love to.”
8.
Shannon
It was like he sucked up all the air in the room. When Jace moved farther into my kitchen and sat down at the last available seat at the table, my heart gave a sharp, hard thump. Maybe it was Beethoven’s hopelessly romantic words written to his Immortal Beloved, or perhaps it was simply Jace’s presence alone, but my cheeks were flushed, my chest hot.
“So, what was that?” Jace asked, glancing at Ozzie. I wasn’t entirely in love with his idea to invite Jace to join us just now. But there’d been something in Jace’s expression that had told me he wanted to stay, and I didn’t have it in me to reject him.
“It’s one of Beethoven’s love letters,” Margie explained. “He wrote them to a woman he referred to as his ‘Immortal Beloved’; however, it’s not known for certain who she was. Some theorise it was his brother’s wife.”
“That theory was debunked,” Lotte put in. “People only believe it because of the movie.”
Jace’s eyebrows jumped. “It’d be an awkward family dynamic, if it were true.” His gaze flicked to me, and I briefly wondered if he was thinking about Roan, though I mostly still refused to entertain his and his father’s theory that the man I’d called a good friend for half my life was in love with me.
“Um, would you like some wine?” I asked, grabbing the bottle that was closest to Lotte. “Ozzie’s on a detox so these are all non-alcoholic.”
“Yes, he’s making us suffer with him,” Margie remarked with a chuckle.
“Hey, it’ll do your liver some good,” Ozzie shot back and I noticed something shift in Jace’s expression. Ah…did he think we were drinking non-alcoholic wine because he was dropping by? An awkward feeling seized me. I knew he was in a good place and that although he should probably avoid being anywhere active drug use was happening, he didn’t need people walking on eggshells around him.
“I’m good,” Jace declined. “I’ll take some mint tea if you have it, though.” He patted his extremely flat, not at all bloated stomach. “Elias fed us way too many carbs at dinner.”
“Sure,” I said, relieved that he didn’t seem offended, but also for the chance to escape the table where all three of my closest friends were observing Jace and me like we were bacteria under a microscope. I busied myself with the kettle while Ozzie finished reading Beethoven’s letter. It was only every so often that we read romantic letters, and it was just my luck that Jace had turned up on the very night we were reading one of the most romantic letters of all time.
The look in his eyes when our gazes met while Ozzie was reading had my stomach fluttering, and I really needed to stop having such intense reactions whenever Jace was in the room.
I was going to meet up with Rufus on Sunday morning for coffee at a nice little place along the canal. I’d forced myself to be brave and ask him out, and he’d said yes. I’d been convincing myself ever since that it was the right move. I needed to decentre Jace, and Rufus seemed like a nice man. I just had to meet him in person to see if we had any real spark.