Total pages in book: 98
Estimated words: 92899 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 372(@250wpm)___ 310(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 92899 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 464(@200wpm)___ 372(@250wpm)___ 310(@300wpm)
It was time to stop wishing Foster would fight for us when he’d told me all along he wasn’t interested in that.
“You’re right,” I said as he turned off the highway onto SERA’s gravel drive. “Long day. I’m exhausted.”
After he threw the SUV into Park, he turned to look at me. “Everything okay? Anything you want to talk about?”
I glanced at him, wondering if this was an opening to discuss my potential job offer. To ask his advice. To feel him out about the possibility of trying to make a long-distance relationship work.
The engine ticked quietly as I turned to face him. “If Matthew hadn’t cheated on you, would the two of you have ended up together?”
Foster’s eyebrows dipped in confusion. “Me and Matthew? What do you mean?”
“Were you in love with him? Would the two of you have ended up together?”
He tilted his head. “Those are two separate questions, Tommy.”
I shot him a look, forcing him to give me a real answer.
Foster sighed and sat back against the door. “I wanted to love him. I wanted to settle down, have a partner I could come home to. Share my life with. I fantasized about the little things. Having a warm body waiting in my bed after a long shift. Spending lazy afternoons in front of a football game or getting up early for a hike in summer.”
He blew out a breath and forked his fingers through his hair. “My friends all have partners now, and I see them at the grocery store or grabbing a quick breakfast at the cafe before work. That’s what I wanted. The everyday companionship.”
“But Matthew moved to New York,” I said. “He wasn’t there with you. So that’s why you didn’t stay together?”
He met my eyes. “The only reason Matthew and I were together at all was because I was an idiot with more hope than practicality. He obviously needed something more. Something bigger. And I had no desire to hold him back or tie him down.”
My stomach dropped like a sack of bricks. I pressed my lips together and nodded. “Understood.”
We moved through our nightly routine by rote, slipping into our own beds automatically. Apparently, our sleeping arrangements were clearly defined based on the unspoken mood between us.
I slept fitfully—so fitfully that Chickie jumped up in my bed at one point and lay down on top of my chest, nuzzling her cold nose in my neck until I relaxed.
The next morning, I awoke to an empty cabin. Foster and Chickie were already gone, so I was able to shower and dress without walking on eggshells or, worse, staring at his body in a way that might lead to something physical.
I made my way to the dining room for breakfast, where Robyn cheerfully waved me over to a spot at her table. “Tommy! Over here. We’ve got room for you, and I wanted to ask you about today’s certification exam for your students.”
While she spoke, I picked out Foster’s and Trace’s voices as they entered the dining room from the direction of Trace’s office. Robyn must have seen me watching them because she glanced over and back to me. “Good news, I think. Foster has a lead on a new medical director for the program.”
It took me a moment to comprehend what she was saying. “A new medical director? Like, my replacement?”
Robyn frowned. “Well, you’re only here for the summer session, right? I guess Foster heard from a guy he knows down in Colorado. They worked on some SAR jobs together, and Foster thinks highly of the guy. He knows Trace needs someone killer to fill your shoes. “
And he’d mentioned it to Trace instead of me?
A thousand questions piled up behind my teeth. I started with just one. “What’s the rush? The next session doesn’t start until mid-August, right?”
Her forehead crinkled. “Yeah, but that’s in five weeks. This is kind of the time we need to be looking, depending on how much notice our ideal candidate needs to give to their current employer.” She leaned in and placed a hand on my arm. “Are you sure you wouldn’t consider staying on for another session? You know we’d love to have you. We’re so lucky you chose to come here this summer!”
I watched Foster and Trace, heads together over steaming mugs of coffee. Neither spared me a moment’s glance, which was galling if they were considering the best person to be the medical director of SERA.
Who better to consult on the topic than the current one? Who better than the only medical professional on-site?
“I know, I know, you can’t stay,” Robyn went on, still talking despite my lack of participation in the conversation. “I think it’s because Foster told Trace you were for sure taking the job in California, that Trace realized he needed to do something—”