Total pages in book: 81
Estimated words: 75833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 75833 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 379(@200wpm)___ 303(@250wpm)___ 253(@300wpm)
I was no princess.
We were quiet for a moment, the hum of the small refrigerator by the counter filling the void between us.
“See you got lost in your past again. Stop looking over your shoulder Melody. No one can touch you here. Whatever it is you and Lyric came from, you’re gonna be fine with us.”
I blinked unsure how to reply. “Is it that obvious?”
She nodded. “Mostly though, I see the bravery. You have a spine of steel. You just need to embrace the woman you are inside.”
“What if I get pulled in and I can’t handle it here?”
“Then you remember this moment right here. The one where this old lady tells you that you belong. You aren’t meant to be someone’s bunny. You aren’t the kind of woman any man puts in the shadows. You are beautiful, brilliant, hardworking, and strong. You just need to see that for yourself. Find your anchor, drop it to the ground, and settle in.”
I didn’t know why, but her telling me I wasn’t meant to be a bunny felt nice. I understood why the girls here did it. They were all running from a past too. They found their place with the Kings. I just couldn’t for the life of me see myself being a puppet to a man’s whims. How was that giving me any different life than I had before?
“Keep your head up. That is the first rule to surviving here. The second rule? Never forget who you are. Not for your past, not for a man, not for a club, and not for anyone. Be okay being you.”
Her words, this conversation calmed me like never before. I could do this. I could figure out exactly who I was meant to be and do it right here in South Carolina.
She gave me a soft smile before heading back to her office.
Eventually the days blurred one into another. Work. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.
Lyric disappeared most evenings. Sometimes with Trinity or Tamra. Other times Maria invited her out. I hadn’t met Maria yet, our shifts never seemed to align. But Lyric said she was a club bunny too. She was a little more rough around the edges than the others according to my cousin. Lyric though, she seemed to want this bunny life because she was with them any chance she got. I wasn’t sure if she enjoyed it or she was simply clinging to a way to survive.
I never asked where she went. I once heard you shouldn’t ask questions you aren’t prepared for the answer to. I thought this was one of those times where ignorance was bliss.
Feeling stir crazy I went to the laundry room to fold towels. I wasn’t on shift, but there was constantly laundry to do and this would help Lexi who I began to form a genuine friendship with. I needed to busy myself or drown in this place inside my head.
Lexi was there folding which surprised me because she tried to leave before dinner time most days. I figured I would be here and help her get ahead for tomorrow. After a quick greeting we folded together quietly and comfortably. That was the thing with Lexi, she was good with quiet and it wasn’t awkward.
In a bit, she spoke. “You’re not like the rest of us.”
I looked up in a bit of shock. “What do you mean?”
“You think things are still black and white. Sometimes Melody you have to wade into the gray. When that time comes don’t run from it. Embrace the cloudiness.”
I took in her words unsure what to say. Faye just told me everything was black and white with the Kings, now Lexi told me to look for the gray.
After a few minutes, I whispered, “I don’t know how to embrace the gray. Faye said it’s black and white with the Kings. So which is it?”
“The Kings aren’t bad men, Melody. They can be overwhelming. They can be overbearing. But they protect what matters to them. This business, their girls, even us bunnies. They see everything in black and white. But to accept this lifestyle as a female you have to embrace the gray areas. I don’t know what you’re running from, but you’ll be safe here. Settle in, babe.”
“It’s not what, it’s who,” I shared openly.
“We’re all running from someone, babe. Even some of those skeletons in all our closets tie back to men. Find your place here. I don’t care where you came from or where you’re thinking about going, the world is a cold, cruel place. The Kings though, they manage the chaos and follow their own code to the end of time. You can find warmth in this makeshift family.”
“I’m not Lyric. I can’t keep my mouth shut and blend in.” I share honestly.
My opinion, my discernment, it all kept me in trouble with the church. I asked questions without hesitation. Being here, I had tucked myself into a protective shell. I couldn’t bust out of that into this world without making myself vulnerable. The stakes with these people seemed to be next level. If I talked back, didn’t walk the line, I wasn’t sure I would still be breathing when they got done with me.