Total pages in book: 54
Estimated words: 49589 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 248(@200wpm)___ 198(@250wpm)___ 165(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 49589 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 248(@200wpm)___ 198(@250wpm)___ 165(@300wpm)
She looked up, her gray eyes red-rimmed and filled with pain. For a moment, we just stared at each other. I saw a flicker of relief in her gaze, quickly followed by shame. She tried to wipe away her tears, but fresh ones kept falling.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her voice hoarse as she visibly tried to pull herself together.
“You have nothing to be sorry for. Nothing at all.”
She gave a shaky laugh that was more of a sob. “I should be stronger than this. I’m a nurse, for God’s sake.”
“You’re the strongest person I know. You had to be, to work in that place. But you’re still here, still fighting.”
Nadine looked at me, her chin quivering. “Am I? Sometimes I feel like I’m just going through the motions.”
“Honey, you forget I worked in hospitals with nurses on the outside. You have more compassion for the people you treat than any nurse I’ve ever met. I told you to work in a nursing home or a hospital, but I was wrong.”
That statement startled her. She stilled, then pulled back to look at me in confusion. “I don’t understand.”
“A place with truly sick people would slowly take every ounce of compassion you had. Those places would drain you of life, then discard you like surgical instruments no one wants to clean.” I grinned. She might not have been allowed in the actual patient care areas, but everyone heard managers talking about the tossing of equipment when more had to be ordered. Especially the fucking gold-handled needle drivers. Which… didn’t matter now. “I never wanted you to be attacked and scared out of your mind, but I’m glad you’re here. With me.” I added the last part without even considering what I was about to say. But the fact was, I was glad she was with me. I wanted her with me. I wanted to watch her flourish in a positive environment.
She nodded. I really thought the whole moment would change, that she’d climb off my lap and we might talk for a while until she got tired enough to sleep. She surprised me by leaning forward, resting her forehead against my shoulder. I froze for a second, then carefully wrapped my arms back around her.
“I’ve got you,” I murmured, feeling her relax slightly against me. “You’re safe now. I’ll make fuckin’ sure of it.”
“I volunteer on my nights off with a program that gives rides to people too drunk to drive.” She sniffed as she made her confession. “One woman I took to a hotel saw my name badge in the console of my car and flipped out.” She sniffed and clung to me tighter. “I thought she was just drunk, but she mentioned Grayson by name. That was back when I first moved here. I thought Grayson was an asshole, but I never saw the side of him she described.” She took in a shuddering breath. “Until today.”
“There’s so much to unpack in that confession…” I couldn’t help but mutter even as I found myself kissing the top of her head reassuringly.
She snorted delicately. “You could be right. Can we unpack most of it later?”
“So you volunteer to help drunk idiots get home safe.” I wanted to scold her for willingly letting drunk men she didn’t know in her car, but I couldn’t. Not now.
“It’s not like you think. They had a dash cam on us at all times, and I only transported women. They were actually glad to have a female driver because they felt it was safer for everyone.”
“OK. I can buy that.” I really couldn’t, but it didn’t matter because she was never doing that again. Sure, someone had to do it, but if this was something she had to do, I’d be doing it with her.
We sat there for a long time. I actually thought Nadine had dozed off, but she hadn’t.
“Pain? What’s going to happen to Chuck and Jermaine?”
That startled me. I hadn’t expected her to even think about those two, let alone wonder about them. “You’re too compassionate for your own Goddamned good, Nadine.” When she stiffened and would have pulled away, I tightened my hold on her. “Don’t move, honey. I’m not criticizing you.” I chuckled. “After everything you’ve been through, you’re worried about those two clowns.”
“Pain! They’re just kids! Chuck’s got it rough. And Jermaine can only protect him for so long.”
“I know, honey. I’ve already taken care of it. I’ve got someone on them, watching over them. They might still get in trouble, but anything not of their own making, my guys will take care of it.”
“I just don’t think that’s a good place for them.”
“Christ, woman.” I wasn’t sure if I wanted to laugh or cry. “You’re killing me.”
“Look, I know what they both did. Jermaine was playing with a loaded gun and shot another teen. Because of the political climate in the area, he was charged as an adult and painted as a monster, but it was an accident. Irresponsible and stupid, but an accident. Chuck killed his mother and stepfather after the mother let the stepfather rape him. Repeatedly. His stepbrother was the district attorney, so even though he recused himself you know he had sway over the process.”