Total pages in book: 94
Estimated words: 86444 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 86444 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 432(@200wpm)___ 346(@250wpm)___ 288(@300wpm)
“Hey there,” she says to me softly. “How about we blow this popsicle stand and head on home?” She leans her head back, expecting me to give her a kiss like I always do, but instead, I nod my head. Her words replaying over and over in my head.
“Do you need to tell Layla you are leaving?” I ask, and she looks around.
“I don’t even see her.” She looks at me. “She must have already left.”
We walk down the stairs, and I wave to a couple of people before we walk over and get into a waiting car. I open the door for her, and she steps in while I give the driver my address. I put my head back on the seat and close my eyes. “Someone isn’t used to staying out late,” she says jokingly, and I grab her hand, bringing it to my lips.
“I just have a headache,” I say and keep my eyes closed until the car stops. I wonder if she knows something is bothering me. I wonder if she feels me pull away from her. We walk up the walkway to the house beside each other, the only sound is the clicking of her heels. I don’t hold her hand, and I wonder if she noticed.
“You are quiet. Why are you so quiet?” she asks. I try to act as natural as possible, but my heart and my head have been spinning and reeling. I unlock the door and walk into the living room, seeing Bernadette watching television.
She looks over at us, getting up. “You look so beautiful, Candace,” she says to her, smiling, and I have to agree with her. She is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.
“How was tonight?” I ask, putting my hands in my pockets and ignoring the look that Candace is giving me.
“It was fine. She was fussy a bit at bedtime. I had to read the story to her five times, but then she went straight to bed.” She smiles at me.
“I’m going to go check on her,” I say, walking out of the room and getting away from them. I step into the dark room and walk straight to the crib. Ari is lying on her side, and her soft snores fill the room. “It’s you and me, baby girl,” I say softly, putting my hands on the railing of the crib. I take a deep breath, and I ignore the pain I have in the middle of my chest. A pain that I’ve never ever felt before. I watch her hanging my head. “I’m so sorry,” I say, turning and walking out of the room.
When I walk back into the kitchen, I see Candace standing by the counter. “Bernadette just left,” she says, and I force a smile at her. “What’s wrong with you?” she finally asks me, and I shake my head.
“I’m fine.” I walk to the fridge, avoiding looking at her. “I’m just tired.”
“You’re lying to me,” she says the words softly, and I make the mistake of looking at her. Her face is like a fucking angel. She is perfect in every meaning of the word.
“I’m not lying.” I brush it off, and I want to finish and avoid this conversation so hard. “I’m tired.”
“Rule number six or I don’t know seven.” She puts her hands on the counter in front of her. Her hair falls over her bare shoulder when she looks down at her hands and then looks up. The worry is written all over her face, and I want nothing more than to go to her, take her in my arms, and hold her. Kiss her lips and tuck her hair away from her face. But my feet are stuck to the floor like there is glue under them. “Whatever number we are up to. You don’t lie to me. If something is bothering one of us, we talk about it.” Her voice goes low.
“Nothing is bothering me; I’m just . . .” I start to say, and I look at her. If anything, she deserves the truth from me. “I heard you talking to the other women, and I don’t know, it . . .”
“What did you hear?” she asks with a confused look on her face.
“You want children.” I say three words that stab me in the heart.
“Of course I want children,” she says to me, and I look at her, and at that moment, I know that I have to let her go. “I’m not saying that I want them now.” She throws up her hands. “But eventually, I want to have children.”
“I didn’t . . .” I start to say as my heart starts to pound, and my neck starts to tingle. I feel the room spinning, and I can hear her words over and over in my head. I loosen the tie around my neck.