Total pages in book: 30
Estimated words: 30858 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 154(@200wpm)___ 123(@250wpm)___ 103(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 30858 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 154(@200wpm)___ 123(@250wpm)___ 103(@300wpm)
Nicholas laughed again, sleeves pushed up, already in the middle of it—already comfortable. Already fitting.
I poured myself a glass of wine and sank onto a loveseat, watching as everyone in the room fell a little more under his spell, minute by minute, like this wasn’t temporary at all.
I made it a few more minutes before the pressure in my chest became too much.
I set my glass down and slipped outside to the balcony.
The cold air hit hard, sharp against my skin. I leaned against the railing and focused on breathing, letting the laughter from inside follow me out—proof that whatever had started between Nicholas and me wasn’t staying contained.
This can’t be real.
“Um, Jenna?” Mom called from behind me. “Why are you out here?”
“Just wanted a break.”
“From your amazing family?” she joked.
“Yeah. No offense.”
“None taken.” She laughed and leaned against the railing. “I needed a break, too.”
“Why haven’t you told me to stop calling you ‘Mom’?”
She tilted her head to the side, confused.
“I’m not eight anymore, and I still have my real mom.”
“What’s really bothering you, Jenna?” She interrupted my spiel. “You know damn well that you’ll always be my daughter, and your mother doesn’t have any issues with you calling me ‘Mom,’ either.”
“I wish I never came on this stupid trip with him.”
“Your fiancé?”
“Yes, him. I should’ve stood firm, said no, and stayed in my condo with wine, reality shows, and cartons of Goldfish.” I paused. “I even have the new peppermint flavor.”
“You do? I’ve been looking for that one.”
“It’s divine.”
“Wait a minute, back up.” She waved a hand. “Go back to the ‘should’ve stood firm and said no.’ You lost me here, hun.”
“I think I actually love this man.” My voice cracked. “Like real feelings that aren’t fake at all.”
“That’s a good thing.” She smiled. “I’m so happy for you.”
“I don’t think I’ll ever feel this close to another man,” I said. “He’s messing up the future I thought I wanted.”
“Okay.” She took the glass from my hand and set it on the deck. “I think you’ve had enough of this.”
“Do you understand what I’m saying here?” I asked. “I didn’t realize how much Nicholas meant to me.”
“That’s good, right?” She looked confused. “Shouldn’t he mean a lot if you’re marrying him?”
“No. Because I’m not really marrying him. I mean, I’m just his fiancée, for now. Don’t you understand?”
She threw up her hands as the back door swung open.
Nicholas stepped out with a drink in hand, looking between us.
“I’ll go to the other side,” he said. “I was just getting some fresh air.”
“No, don’t bother.” Mom smiled at him. “Jenna is having a mini meltdown and needs you right now. Don’t let her return inside until she’s sane. Please.”
She hugged me before disappearing inside.
Nicholas joined me at the railing, setting down his glass.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“There are tears in your eyes.”
“Those are snowflakes.”
“Okay.” He wiped my cheeks with his fingertips. “Snow isn’t typically warm.”
“I want a clean break when this is all over,” I said. “One hundred percent cold turkey, no communication whatsoever.”
“How much had you had to drink tonight?”
“No ‘how are you’ texts or emails, no ‘wondering how you’re doing’ calls in the middle of the night.” My voice cracked. “Just let me go so I can stop wishing for things that won’t happen, okay?”
He stared at me as the snow fell around us, searching my eyes for a translation of the words I’d said.
Slipping an arm around my waist, he pulled me flush against his chest.
“Are you usually this emotional when you drink?”
His voice stayed calm, but his hand tightened slightly at my waist.
“You already know the answer to that.”
“I do,” he said. “You’re also a lot more truthful, so… the sex this morning meant nothing to you?”
He waited, watching my face instead of pushing for an answer.
I bit my tongue so I wouldn’t answer.
“You’re cheating,” he said, smiling. “Tell me.”
I didn’t say a word.
“Okay, Jenna.” He pressed a kiss to my lips and slid his hands over my hips, slow and deliberate, like he already knew how this would end. “I guess we’ll have to have round four before I get the answer to that.”
“It would be round five…” I whispered.
“Thanks for the correction.” He gently smacked my ass, showing slight restraint. “No more alcohol for the rest of dinner. We’ll talk about the important things when you’re sober.”
“Are we staying here tonight?”
“No, we’re going to get a hotel,” he said. “I’m tired of muffling your screams while you say my name.”
A few hours later, Nicholas stacked all of my presents into the trunk and gave my father a hug.
“I’m glad to call you a son-in-law, Nicholas,” he said to him. “And I’m sure your father would be proud of you, too.”
“Thank you, sir.”
“You’ll be back for our January birthday tradition, won’t you?”
“Jenna has never mentioned that to me,” he said, glancing at me through the window. “What is it exactly?”