Total pages in book: 105
Estimated words: 103050 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 344(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 103050 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 515(@200wpm)___ 412(@250wpm)___ 344(@300wpm)
“You never know,” she says. “If you have a permanent home, some other things in your life might appear.” She shrugs. “You might find someone you want to be with forever. You know what they say—if you build it, they will come.”
“I don’t know anyone who says that,” I snap. The only woman I want in my life forever is my daughter.
“Just tell me you’ll think about it.”
I can’t respond. I feel like a volcano, hot lava about to spew out of me. I’m angry at Gabby for moving on with her life, I’m angry at myself for bringing a daughter into the world that I can’t give a stable home life to.
Growing up, as we moved from base to base, from country to country, I swore I’d never do the same thing to my kid. I promised myself that my kid would have one of those families that appeared on television—the kind that lived in one house their entire lives and had Sunday lunches every weekend. Gabby, Willow, and I are nothing like the family I imagined…but now she’s being offered that traditional family, maybe being with me will be the last place she wants to be. But there’s nothing I can do to make this right.
Right now, I need to cool off. I have to pretend Gabby didn’t just turn our lives upside down. I want to spend the next hour with my daughter, put her to bed, read her a story, and just enjoy this sacred time I have with her.
SEVENTEEN
Aurora
It has taken everything in me not to call Deacon.
But I really want New York to be about making conscious choices. And I need a bit of time and space to figure out what I want.
Of course I want him physically. My hormones are clear about that. But do I really want everything that comes with it? Do I want a man who’s a father? A man who’s in a complicated relationship with his ex?
A man who’s a guest.
The last few days in the hotel, I’ve been able to focus because I know that he’s not around. But today’s Sunday. He’s back. Now I’m in my permanent position as rooms director. I have all the details of the occupancy of every room, and I may have seen the details for Room 325. Deacon Black is all checked in.
It gets to just after four in the afternoon when I find myself in the corridor for his room. I could take the elevators and avoid passing his door, or I could take the stairs.
It’s not a hard decision. I take the stairs. Not because I think we’ll bump into each other. He has no reason to be outside his door. I have no reason to knock. But something pulls me toward him.
My heart pounds louder and louder as I approach his door—and then at the last minute, I double back and head for the elevators.
I’m making this way too complicated. And it’s easy to unpick.
I don’t need to worry that I’m not able to give him more children. He’s asking me for dinner. He’s not giving me a ring.
And I don’t need to worry if he’s got an ex. It’s not like I’m wanting a ring from him either.
I don’t need to worry that he’s sleeping with other women. Of course he is. He’s built like a Greek god, and given the noises I’ve heard from his hotel room, the practice he’s had has helped him perfect his technique.
I want Deacon Black.
I want him even if he’s a guest. And that means Darcy’s right, I need to speak to Avril and Poppy.
I head down to the ground floor and right to their shared office. Lucky for me Avril and Poppy are both working today and now is as good a time as any. The door is open, so I knock as I walk in.
“Hey, Aurora. Did you see the occupancy rates?” Avril asks. “They’re up ten percent year on year.”
“I did see that,” I say.
“It’s the Aurora effect,” Poppy says.
I laugh. “I can’t take the credit.”
“You’d be surprised how much staff makes a difference,” Poppy replies.
“It’s true,” Avril adds. “We had a particular someone on reception at the beginning of the year and the numbers started to tank. The thing is, I know that she wasn’t doing anything wrong. People just didn’t extend their stays or use the restaurants and bars in the same way when she was here.”
I’d heard similar stories when I was working at The Rookery, but it was normally about managers. I’ve never known someone on reception to have such an impact. “I’m glad I’m bringing in the guests.”
“We love having you here,” Avril says. “Don’t we, Poppy?”
“A permanent job is yours if you want it,” she says.
I smile, but don’t respond. They might change their mind about that once I tell them about Deacon Black’s dinner invitation.