Total pages in book: 113
Estimated words: 109299 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 546(@200wpm)___ 437(@250wpm)___ 364(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 109299 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 546(@200wpm)___ 437(@250wpm)___ 364(@300wpm)
Pretty sure giving things away is not helping the boss, but this is not my circus nor my monkeys. “I’d like to pay.”
He shakes his head. “Your money’s no good here.”
“I bet it cashes just fine,” I say.
“Nope,” he says with a pop of his lips.
The fact that he thinks he can win this battle of wills with me is, admittedly, impressive. No wonder Ripley hired him. He has tenacity under this chill exterior.
That goes on for about another minute until I stare him down and say in no uncertain terms, “I’m not leaving until I pay.”
With a huff, he holds up his hands, relenting. “Have it your way.”
I buy the eye mask, thank him, and leave, setting the mask neatly on the nightstand in the cottage. We’ll see if it helps relieve all my supposed tension after all.
When it’s dinnertime, I don’t expect Ripley to feed me. I tell Lila and Ripley that I’ll order takeout, but Lila insists, and I’m not one to argue with grandmothers. At dinner we discuss security precautions for the farm, and I review the plan. But I’m pleased that Lila and Ripley are savvy already about best practices.
And, like I promised, I show Ripley that she can take care of everyone and everything while I look out for her. I’ll do it again tomorrow and throughout the length of the shoot, respecting her boundaries and the boundaries of the job.
As the day fades and night settles its blanket over the farm, I nod toward the front door, a sign I’m heading off to my quarters for the night.
“See you and Hudson bright and early,” I say with a wink as I reach for the doorknob but don’t open it.
“Just try to keep up with me,” she retorts.
“I’ll be up and at ’em.”
“Right, because you don’t sleep.” She cocks her head to the side, lifting her chin. “Hey. Are you a vampire bodyguard?”
“Do you think I am, Ripley?”
“I’m definitely getting that impression. But you’re not allergic to sunlight. Hmm.”
I roll my eyes, but I’m smiling as I shift back to the practical. “Tomorrow, the crew comes. That’s when things will start to get more hectic. It’ll be more important—”
“I know. I get why it’s important to have you,” she says, mimicking my serious tone.
I’d like to have her.
“You’re just saying that because you can’t shake me,” I tease.
She arches an eyebrow. “I can’t?”
Fuck. I almost forgot who I was dealing with. I drag a hand down my face. “What have I done?” I mutter.
When I look up, she sure looks like she’ll be having the last laugh. “I guess we’ll see.”
I sure will. But I’ll rise to the challenge. “Then, I can’t wait to see how you’re going to try to shake me tomorrow.”
Ripley’s smile is too damn pleased. “It is on.”
18
THE TOILET PAPER FAIRY
RIPLEY
Do I have a lot to do at the farm?
You bet.
Am I going to get it all done?
No problem.
But am I still going to find new ways to drive Banks crazy?
Of course I am. A challenge is a challenge is a challenge.
After I walk the dog (with Banks), do the Saturday-morning chores (with Banks), hop on my computer in my makeshift office on the living room couch in the farmhouse to pay some invoices, review production plans, and check in with the stores around the area that carry our lavender oils, soaps, sachets, lotions, and potions (without Banks, who’s presumably skulking around the lavender maze, checking for hidden cameras in its coils and twists of hedges), I grab my phone. Make an appointment for this afternoon. Then, I text my girls as I trot upstairs to grab the laundry.
Ripley: Guess who has a plan to drive her bodyguard crazy?
Then, I tell them about the plan and the appointment I made. But Chloe’s not interested in my evil genius, evidently.
Chloe: Um, can we hear more about the hot bodyguard instead of your plans?
Bridget: As in, where can I get one?
Chloe: What she said!
Bridget: Honestly, all innkeepers should henceforth have bodyguards. Let’s make it a new town ordinance.
Chloe: I’d be all over that vote. Solidarity!
Ripley: Excuse me, can I get a word in edgewise?
Chloe: Better text faster, girl.
Bridget: Yeah, we have town bylaws to pass, Ripley. Hear ye, hear ye—I hereby declare all the women of Darling Springs who want a bodyguard shall have one.
Chloe: Some men might want them too.
Bridget: Good point. Come and get ’em! Hot bodyguards for sale here at my hot bodyguard stand!
Ripley: It’s not all it’s cracked up to be!
Chloe: La, la, la, la, la. I can’t hear you.
Ripley: He follows me everywhere!
Bridget: To the bathroom? To the shower?
Ripley: No, and no.
Chloe: To your…bedroom?
She finishes that text with the wide-open-eyes emoji. I laugh as I dump the clothes and towels in the washing machine, voice texting my reply.