Total pages in book: 49
Estimated words: 46197 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 231(@200wpm)___ 185(@250wpm)___ 154(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 46197 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 231(@200wpm)___ 185(@250wpm)___ 154(@300wpm)
His tall, dark form slipped inside the room, and the door quietly closed behind him. The moonlight spilling in from the windows illuminated his face, and I hoped it didn’t shine on mine. I didn’t have to see myself to know my eyes were red and swollen.
“You need to leave,” I said in a hoarse whisper. “We had our closure,” I reminded him.
His long, muscular legs took only a few strides before he was there beside my bed. I didn’t want to make eye contact or turn so he could see my face, but he grabbed my chin roughly and forced it. He leaned down close to me, his gaze almost menacing.
“What? Did you think a fuck in the woods meant I forgave you?” he sneered. “You shredded me, my soul. Your betrayal didn’t just ruin my life; it ruined me. Destroyed me.” He leaned in closer, and I tried to pull my chin from his hold, but it tightened, and he held me there. “Yeah, Songbird, I fucked you. But my cock doesn’t seem to hold a grudge.” He let me go then with a shove that jerked my head to the side.
I was torn between anger and sorrow. Closing my eyes, I fought off the onset of more tears. They accomplished nothing and only made me appear guilty and weak. I was neither.
“Then leave,” I croaked.
“I wish like fuck I could. I wish the scent of you on my skin wasn’t so damn addictive that I can’t make myself take a shower.”
I pressed my lips together to hold in a sob, then took a steady breath.
“You hate me for something you think I did,” I said in a hoarse whisper. “But you never asked me. Never let me explain.”
“I saw it!” he hissed through his teeth, interrupting me. “I didn’t need a motherfucking detailed description or a lie!”
I didn’t know if it was the false accusation, his lack of faith in me, or simply four years of pain that caused it, but I snapped.
I jerked my head back around to face him, and my hands fisted in my lap as I dropped the covers. “But you’re here,” I said with more force. “So, you can listen or leave.”
He made no move to go anywhere, so I began to purge the truth I’d never been able to share.
“Pirate broke into my bedroom that night and got into my bed while I was sleeping. I had known he could pick the lock, so I’d started adding a chair beneath the doorknob for added protection. But that night, while my mom worked in the room across from me, I’d been afraid to barricade the door while she was awake in case she tried to come in, and I fell asleep, texting with you, before she went to bed. When I woke up, I realized he was in my bed and panicked, and then I saw you with the knife.” I stopped and swallowed. “And I was relieved. I knew you would kill him, and I was relieved. Not thinking past what that meant for either of us. Just that I wouldn’t have to live in fear in my own house anymore.” I sucked in a breath.
I’d never admitted it out loud. My desire for Pirate to die. But it was true. He’d made me a monster too. One who wished death on another.
“Why did you know he would pick your lock?” The question was one I’d expected.
“That was my lie of omission. Something I kept from you to protect you because if you knew, you’d do exactly what you did, and I was scared of what would happen to you if you did.”
His nostrils flared, and his eyes narrowed. “What did you protect me from, Cressida?”
“Six months after we started dating, I woke up to Pirate in bed with me and his hand down the front of my panties.” I winced from the bile in my throat. “I screamed. He covered my mouth and held me there. He told me if I ever said anything to anyone, he’d kill Mom in her sleep. We heard the footsteps on the stairs then, and he hurried out of my room. When my mom got to my room to see why I had screamed, I told her it was a nightmare.”
Kash’s chest was rising and falling as he took hard, fast breaths. He shoved a hand through his black hair and fisted it, then began to pace.
I sat, saying no more as I watched him.
“You should have told me that night. Called me. He’d have been gone before morning,” Kash said, shaking his head as if he were a caged animal.
“I thought I was protecting y—”
He moved so fast that I almost let out a yelp, but he was in my face before I could utter a sound. “I protect you! Me. I’m the protector. You’re mine to protect.” His words went from rage to desperation. He placed both his palms on the mattress beside me and hung his head, letting out a ragged breath. “You were mine to protect. And I failed.”