Total pages in book: 63
Estimated words: 60700 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 304(@200wpm)___ 243(@250wpm)___ 202(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60700 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 304(@200wpm)___ 243(@250wpm)___ 202(@300wpm)
Lexi
I hide my face in Bobby’s neck. I feel so raw emotionally. My life has been one giant upheaval this week, and I seriously don’t know up from down. Head from tail.
I do know that it feels nice to be accepted like this, even when I’m a total mess. I like that he came over, anticipating that I might be mixed-up and feeling vulnerable after what went down between us.
“Were you really mad, Bobby? Or is it just…part of the game?”
He rubs slow circles over my back. “I was mad, yes.” He coaxes my head away from his shoulder and cups my face. Finding my gaze, he holds it, making me flush.
He strokes my cheek with his thumb. “But I also have a streak of sadism in me. So spanking you was a pleasure for me.”
It’s not a huge revelation. I mean, I totally knew dominance was his kink from day one. I just don’t know if he’s trying to tell me something else. Like, if there’s more, and this was just the tip of the iceberg.
He watches me closely. I get the feeling he’s bracing for my reaction to his admission.
I swallow. “So..it turned you on?”
“Yes, the second you put yourself in position for me, all my piss-off was gone, and it became foreplay.”
I examine my reaction to his words. I’m not offended. Not daunted. I appreciate his honesty. What’s more, I like knowing what turns him on. That I pleased him just by accepting the punishment. That he’s really not mad at all anymore. He’s the opposite of mad.
He touches my cheek, and his gaze is warm. “You took it so well, beautiful girl. I loved it when you begged and pleaded but still held the position.”
My face burns, but I don’t look away. I’m incapable of it, caught in his magnetic stare, the pull of his attention so addictive.
“It bonded me to you. Now I know you’re really my girl. You’re willing to do what it takes to make things right with me. I meant it last night when I said there is nothing in the world I wouldn’t do for you. I loved the way you submitted to me for punishment.”
“Did I really have a choice?”
He shrugs. “Definitely. Yeah. You always have a choice. You could walk out of here any time, sugar. You’re not my prisoner. But if you stay, you follow my rules. That’s our deal.”
I take a deep breath. “There’s this part of me that keeps freaking out about everything. Like this is just one giant mind-fuck, and I’m playing right into your hands. Did you ever see that movie 9½ Weeks?”
“I thought it was hot.”
I laugh. “Okay, so did I. But the message was that it was all wrong for her. And he was dangerous.”
Bobby’s brows drew together. “You think I’m a psychopath?”
Do I? No. He seems quite sane, actually. I shake my head. “No. I’m just confused. I’ve been mixed up all morning, that’s why you caught me sitting around in my pajamas. Part of me feels bad about screwing up and getting in trouble, and then another part is a little upset that you actually punished me. And then still another part says none of it was real–it’s just the way you like to have sex. And then the last piece of me says who really cares what you do, you just gave me a thousand bucks. If you want to take a belt to my ass and get us both off afterward, who am I to complain?”
Bobby’s smile is sexy as hell. “I don’t know, Lex. It is confusing. I like to be in charge of you. I like to punish—in the bedroom and for real. And real-life spanking is hotter to me, even when it isn’t sexy in the moment. Does it make any sense to say that knowing you will submit to me in real life makes the sex steamier when we play?”
I relax. He’s definitely sane. Hearing him articulate his fetish makes it obvious. He understands his quirk and doesn’t believe punishing a woman for breaking rules is a God-given right afforded to men. Or even a normal, accepted behavior. He may be a dangerous criminal, but he’s not deranged. He knows the line he walks.
In fact, it totally explains why he prefers the whole “arrangement” thing versus a real girlfriend.
He picks up my hand and interlaces his fingers over the tops of mine. “I know you liked some part of it, too,” he murmurs.
I almost don’t want to admit it, even though it’s true. Because what if he gets even more intense with this? What if I no longer like it?
I lift our joined hands to my lips and kiss his fingers as my answer.
“So you’re staying? You’re still my girl?”
“Did you bring any money?” I ask with mock greediness. “No, just kidding. Bad joke. I sort of hate myself for using you like this.”