BTW By the Way – After Oscar Read online Lucy Lennox

Categories Genre: M-M Romance, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 92
Estimated words: 85565 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 428(@200wpm)___ 342(@250wpm)___ 285(@300wpm)
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It wasn’t exactly the life I dreamed of—that one would have included Sawyer. But it was a new life nevertheless. It was a place to start.

I slid the crowbar under another marble slab and pressed my weight against it, holding my breath and grunting. When it wouldn’t budge, I grabbed the sledgehammer, hefting it high overhead and bringing it down with all my might, putting my rage and pain into the swing.

The marble gave way, splintering and shattering with a loud crack. I stood, breathing heavily, rivulets of sweat trailing down my back.

I didn’t hear the door open. Didn’t even realize it had until I heard a voice humming softly behind me. I spun, sledgehammer still clenched in both my fists.

He stood in the shadow of the doorway, but it didn’t matter. I recognized his voice. I recognized the song. It was Rihanna’s “Umbrella,” the line about there not being distance between our love.

Sawyer.

I dropped the sledgehammer and lunged for him. For a moment I worried that I might have imagined him, that I might have conjured him from my heart’s desire. But then he was in my arms and he was solid and warm and he was Sawyer and he was here and mine.

I crushed him against my chest, not caring that I was sweaty and covered in dust. I needed him against me; I needed to hold him.

I could feel him trembling, his shoulders heaving, and I stepped away, terrified that I’d hurt him or done something wrong. His eyes glistened, tear tracks streaming down his cheeks.

“Baby,” I whispered. I swiped a thumb across his tears, desperate to make them stop. “What’s wrong. Are you okay?”

“I’m sorry,” he said, choking on a sob. “I’m so, so sorry.”

My heart broke seeing him so desperately upset. “Why?”

“I left you,” he cried. “I was scared and overwhelmed, and I didn’t want to. God I didn’t want to leave you, James, but I didn’t want to fuck up your life and I still don’t but I don’t know how to live without you and I want to find a way to make it work. I’ll take cotillion or etiquette lessons and learn how to talk about the stock market. I don’t care so long as I’m with you.”

I didn’t understand half of what he was saying. “Cotillion? Stock market? I don’t give a shit about any of that, Sawyer. It’s you I care about. You who I…” I paused, the word already forming on my lips.

But I wanted what I was about to say next to be deliberate. I didn’t want it to get lost in the conversation or come out rushed. So I took a deep breath and I cupped his cheeks in my hands and I pulled him close until our foreheads almost touched and all I could see was him. “It’s you I love, Sawyer. You exactly as you are. You in my bed at night and wrapped around me in the morning. It’s you I want to watch every sunset with. You’re my green flash, Sawyer. You’re my wish come true.”

He sucked in a breath. “Really?” he whispered.

He sounded so vulnerable and unsure, and it was so unlike the Sawyer I knew. I wanted to cradle him against me and protect his heart in mine forever. “I love you, Sawyer Gilley,” I breathed against his lips. “I’ll never stop loving you.”

Then his arms were around me, and his mouth was on mine. “I love you too,” he said between kisses. “Love you so, so much.”

Hearing those words unlocked something inside me. It made me feel free. It didn’t matter that I didn’t have a job and was about to sell my house and had no idea what the future held. All I needed was Sawyer. He was my future.

He was my home.

I lost myself in the taste of him. The feel and smell of him, so familiar that it made my heart swell. Finally we broke apart, breathing heavily. His eyes slowly regained focus, and he glanced around the half-demolished entryway. “This looks… different from the last time I was here.”

I chuckled, taking a step back and running a hand through my hair. “I decided to do a little remodeling. I’m planning to put it on the market.”

He toed a piece of broken marble. “Karlie mentioned inviting you to the shower and getting a bounce back email that you no longer worked at the firm.”

“Yeah, I quit.” I didn’t mention that I was pretty sure if I hadn’t I would have been politely asked to resign. But I’d wanted it to be my decision, so I’d left before the firm could make the suggestion.

A frown furrowed his forehead, and he chewed his lower lip a moment before asking, “Was it… because of me?” He sounded worried, and his concern made me smile.


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