Total pages in book: 64
Estimated words: 60081 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 60081 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 300(@200wpm)___ 240(@250wpm)___ 200(@300wpm)
“I mean it,” I assure her, moving a chair out of the way and setting her gently on the table. “I like you even more than I did before our unfortunate incident.”
She wrinkles her nose. “Promise me you’ll still feel that way once you’ve seen how badly I need a pedicure? I just haven’t had time, what with getting ready to move and all. My polish is all chipped.”
I arch a dubious brow. “Do other guys really care about stuff like that?”
“Some do,” she says, with a shrug. “My ex said it looked tacky.”
I huff. “We’ve already established he’s an idiot. And I have a kid. Once you’ve changed an exploded diaper and cleaned vomit out of your undershirt, nothing about a normal human body can gross you out.”
She nods, not seeming bothered by the news that I have a little one at home. “Good point. Like I said, I work with kids. I know those horrors well.”
“So, you know I’m right. Besides, you wouldn’t be grossed out if my manscaping needed a touch up or I forgot to wear deodorant one day, right?”
“No way.” A bit of the mischief returns to her eyes. “I think I’d like you furry and stinky, actually. We could role play as Tarzan and his proper English lady. You can grunt a lot and I’ll try to teach you to eat with a spoon. I’ll wear a corset you can rip off me and everything.”
I grin. “I’m holding you to that. Though right now I’m hoping ripping is nowhere in our near future.”
She sobers quickly. “Right. Please be careful. I’m attached to my clitoris. More than literally. She’s more than my favorite body part. She’s a friend I can count on when times are tough. She’s always there to listen and deliver good feelings, all while asking nothing in return. She’s just a gem, you know?”
Pretty sure I’m falling in love with this woman, simply based on that single comment alone, I say, “I get it. She’s amazing and will be handled with care.”
Tatum nods. “Okay.” She pulls in a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “Then let’s do it. You go first, and if the situation needs another set of eyes, I’ll be ready. Though to be honest, I’m really hoping I don’t have to look because I think seeing it is going to freak me out.”
“Noted,” I lean in, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek and promising, “We’ll get through this. We just need to stay calm and take it one step at a time.” Bracing myself, I pull back to get a better look at the situation.
My cock piercing is indeed caught in her piercing, as expected, but it’s more complicated than I anticipated. When I try to unhook the ball at the end of my piercing from between her ring and ball piercing, I can’t get the balls to part from their respective clasps. It’s like they’ve been fused together by the heat between us.
Which would be kind of hot, I guess, if we weren’t stuck together and likely on our way to seek professional medical assistance.
I keep working at it, sensing her growing anxiety. Though to her credit, she stays pretty quiet aside from the occasional, “You’ve got this. You’re doing a great job. I can tell.”
But finally, there’s no denying the reality of the situation.
I glance up, catching her gaze with a sigh.
“No luck?” she asks.
“No luck,” I say. “Unless you have needle nosed pliers, I don’t think we’re going to get very far on our own. And I’m honestly a little hesitant to start messing around in such a sensitive area with tools. I can fix a broken garbage disposal and stuff like that, but I’m a lawyer, not a handyman.”
“You’re a lawyer?” she asks, sounding shocked. “But you don’t seem anything like a lawyer. You’re not snotty or stuck up at all.”
I smile. “Well, thanks. I’m a real estate lawyer so maybe that helps. It’s not very glamorous.”
“I think it’s glamorous. You did all that schooling and graduated and passed the bar and that’s badass. I barely made it through two years of community college. I’m reasonably intelligent, but I’ve never been great at school.”
“I think you’re very sharp,” I say honestly. “Very sharp and very funny, which is great because you’re going to need your sense of humor for what comes next.”
Her eyes go big again. “Oh no. We’re going to the ER after all.”
“No, we’re going to a private medical office,” I say. “Or we may luck out, and I’ll be able to convince the doctor to come here since driving in our current condition wouldn’t be easy.”
She exhales, her shoulders sinking away from her ears. “Oh wow, that would be so great. Tell her I’ll bring her cookies every week for the next year if she’ll do the house call. And my cookies are really top notch. I’ve had people offer to commit crimes for my cookies.”