Total pages in book: 18
Estimated words: 16911 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 85(@200wpm)___ 68(@250wpm)___ 56(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 16911 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 85(@200wpm)___ 68(@250wpm)___ 56(@300wpm)
I gathered up all my supplies and set my bags on the granite island in the kitchen. I looked around at the work I’d done, pretty proud of myself. The scent of lemon and lavender filled my head, essential oils I used for cleaning. I never used the artificial, chemical crap they sold in stores.
I tried to act like I was completely collected, which I’d been doing ever since I first came to Big’s house. But being around his things and his home, knowing he was just right upstairs, that he was watching me, made me even more aware of my body’s reaction to him.
I didn’t know how long I planned on keeping my mouth shut about how I felt, but I knew it wasn’t good for me. So, I’d come to the conclusion that after I was finished with this job, I would just be honest. I would tell him everything, let him know that for the past five years, I’d been pining after him, wanting things I knew probably could never happen. I’d even admit I’d fallen in love with him, which he’d probably laugh at, think I was insane, but I had to tell him these things.
I had to get them off my chest and be honest, not just with him but with myself too.
I owed that to myself, to my sanity.
I headed toward the front door and stopped, looking over my shoulder and glancing up to where the loft was, where I knew Big was in his study. But he wasn’t in his office. He stood by the banister, his large hands wrapped around the wood, his focus trained right on me.
My heart was racing double time, and I licked my lips nervously. “I’m done for the day, unless there’s anything else you need me to do?” There was heavy silence between us, and instantly my mind thought of dirty things, things I wanted him to say to me, order me to do because he just couldn’t help himself.
God, there were so many things I fantasized concerning Big, so many nights I lay in bed and touched myself, thinking about him.
“Thank you, Landry. The kitchen looks great.” He kept staring at me, his focus trained right on me.
I smiled, but it felt tight, nervous. “You’re welcome,” I whispered but wasn’t even sure he could hear me. I needed to get out of here before I made a fool out of myself. Just staring at him had my entire body on fire, had desire and arousal claiming me so powerfully I felt lightheaded, dizzy, and about ready to pass out. I licked my lips out of nervousness, knowing no matter what I wanted, what I wanted to do, I didn’t want to make a fool of myself. “Okay, well, I’ll be back first thing tomorrow morning to do the bathrooms next, if that works?”
He didn’t answer right away, but then he gave a nod and a gruff sound as agreement.
God, he was so large and tall, so hard and muscular. He made me feel tiny.
I turned to leave, taking a deep breath, still smelling his scent, loving the way just the aroma of his cologne made me feel all tingly. The way I felt, the way he looked at me, made me want to forget about formalities and what was the “right way” to do something. It made me want to just throw caution to the wind and go after what I’d wanted for far too long.
I wanted to press myself to his body, to feel every single hard inch of him against my softness.
I walked to my car, opened up the back passenger door to put the cleaning supplies on the seat, and turned back around. A startled gasp left me when I realized Big was standing right there, just a few feet from me.
“Oh,” I said, that lone word leaving me on its own. “Everything okay?” That sounded a hell of a lot more breathy and needy than I’d obviously meant.
Even though the fresh air surrounded me, I felt claustrophobic, like his very presence sucked the oxygen right from my lungs. I found myself moving a step back until my car stopped my retreat. I didn’t know what I was trying to escape, because it sure as hell wasn’t Big.
He stood right in front of me, his big body making me feel secure, safe… aroused. A breeze moved through the trees, lightly brushing the fallen leaves along the ground, making a cacophony that had all kinds of other feelings swirling within me.
My heart was beating a mile a minute, and my palms were sweaty. God, I was so nervous. All I wanted to do was tell him everything, just say the words, how I felt, what he made me feel. But I was so scared.
I took a deep breath, maybe about to just tell him I loved him, but the words were stalled in my throat when he took a step toward me. On instinct, I looked down, my face feeling like it was on fire.