Total pages in book: 49
Estimated words: 47103 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 236(@200wpm)___ 188(@250wpm)___ 157(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 47103 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 236(@200wpm)___ 188(@250wpm)___ 157(@300wpm)
We’d mourned the loss of him as though there’d been a death in the family. Knowing he was nearby had been heartbreaking too. So close…but gone.
And now…he was here.
Xander.
A pint-sized blond baby boy with blue eyes, chubby cheeks, sitting on a quilted blanket with a teddy bear and three chunky plushie toy trucks in a judge’s chambers. He wasn’t a mystery or a dream anymore. He had a name, a registered birth date of February tenth, a pediatrician’s record of immunizations, allergies, and a note regarding medication for a persistent earache he’d had last September.
It was all very ordinary, and yet Xander had never been ordinary to us.
We stepped into the chambers as if walking on eggshells. I think I shook hands with another lawyer, maybe two lawyers, but don’t quote me. My gaze was fixed on the adorable towheaded boy, his tiny feet kicking happily as he hummed around the fist he was attempting to stuff into his mouth.
Aaron’s breath hitched the second he spotted Xander. He ignored the lawyers and made a beeline to the blanket, sinking to his knees a few feet away from the cooing baby. “Hi, there.”
A kind-faced Black woman with long braids and a wide, welcoming grin motioned for me to join them too. “I’m Angie, Cassie’s friend.”
“I’m Aaron and this is my husband, Matt. We’ve…” He paused when his voice cracked and tried again. “We’ve been looking forward to meeting this little guy.”
“I know you have. Ask me anything. I won’t hold back. Cassie wants Xan-man to be happy, and I do too. He’s a sweet baby, very chill. He’s usually a good sleeper, but he’s teething lately and…well, check him out. He’s a drooling machine.”
Aaron snickered, but his eyes watered and his face took on a look of absolute wonder. “Whatcha got there, Xander? That’s a nice teddy bear. He has big paws, doesn’t he?”
I sat gingerly, on the fringe of the blanket, happy to observe Aaron meeting Xander for the first time. His tone was melodic and full of whimsy, and his playful mannerism was…safe. Aaron was a fucking natural with babies. Knowing how significant this moment was for us, I was more in awe of him than ever.
I felt like a clumsy giant in comparison…in a suit, no less. Too big, too awkward. This seemed to be a regular occurrence lately, and I wasn’t sure that boded well for me.
“Cassie talks about you two,” Angie commented casually, scooting closer to me. “She feels bad about what went down.”
“Mmm.”
“It’s true. Between hormone fluctuations and crazy-ass faux in-laws making a claim on her body, she was just…not equipped for battle. Not strong enough to stand her ground and fight. Not that she had to fight. They left her high and dry.”
“I heard.”
Angie smiled at Aaron, sitting cross-legged in his designer wear, spinning a tale for Xander about a mythical teddy bear. “She lives on my floor. I borrowed flour for a cake I was baking for an ex. When he didn’t show up, I brought it to her place. She wouldn’t take it unless I had a piece. We stayed up late, eating my terrible cake, drinking too much wine, and talkin’ about stupid boys. A few years later, we’re still friends. Cassie is super smart—big brain, but common sense is a challenge sometimes. She’s young yet, and I’m sure she told you she never wanted to be a mom. She thought of him as temporary…like she was just a guardian. That boy deserves more than that.”
“He does.” My throat constricted as Xander crawled toward Aaron and reached for his nose.
Xander giggled, a surprisingly low-pitched sound that ended in a squeal. Aaron laughed, glancing my way, a quiet question in his gaze. Are you seeing this? What do you think?
I didn’t have a chance to say a word ’cause Xander was a baby on a mission. He crawled off Aaron’s lap and headed for the nearest plushie truck. I picked it up on a whim and made a vroom vroom noise. He arched a brow and came charging for me.
He sat next to my knee and rescued his truck, babbling nonsense as he smacked it on the rug.
“Hey, your truck squeaks.” I squeezed it at the middle, slightly mortified that my voice warbled like an old man’s.
Xander stared at the truck, then at me…and smiled. A big beaming grin of rosy cheeks, tiny teeth, and lots of drool. I couldn’t have looked away if I’d tried.
Angie said something in the periphery and Aaron joined in, but I was locked in on the little boy jabbering away, his attention fixated on me for reasons unknown. I played along, asking him if he thought it might be the tires or the transmission…or something equally silly. He babbled in reply, rocking himself into a crawling position and climbing onto my lap.